What do you think? Does this paragraph require any improvements? What do you suggest? Should I include more?
Write a paragraph describing Rosa Park's courage.
What I have written: Rosa Parks was an African-American woman who, at the age of 42, had the courage to say "no" to her oppressors. Tired of "giving in," she refused to stand and give her seat upon a public bus to a white man. She was later arrested for her actions and thrown into jail. However, this incident sparked the Montgomery Bus Boycott, which then led to the end of segregation. Therefore, by doing so, she ultimately demonstrated the positive effects one person can have while fighting for change.
Delete the quotation marks around giving in (or are you quoting someone?).
The rest is fine.
I am quoting Rosa Parks.
Are you certain there is nothing that I could improve?
If you are quoting anyone, you need to give the proper citation. Where did you read this? Cite it properly.
https://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/747/01/
Oh. Alright.
Does it require any more improvements, though?
Should I include anything else?
The paragraph you have written provides a good overview of Rosa Parks' courage and her pivotal role in the civil rights movement. However, there are a few suggestions you can consider to enhance the description:
1. Provide more context: Begin the paragraph by briefly introducing the historical and social background of the era in which Rosa Parks lived. This will help readers understand the significance of her actions and the challenges she faced as an African-American woman during that time.
2. Elaborate on the consequences: While you mention that Rosa Parks was arrested and thrown in jail, you can include further details about the immediate and long-term consequences she faced as a result of her act of defiance. This could include the backlash she received from the community and the impact it had on her personal life.
3. Highlight her determination: Emphasize the strength of Rosa Parks' character by mentioning the difficulties she encountered leading up to this momentous act. Explain how her courage to say "no" was not an isolated incident but rather the culmination of years of oppression and mistreatment.
4. Expand on the significance of her action: You briefly mention the Montgomery Bus Boycott, but you can elaborate on how this event was a turning point in the civil rights movement. Describe how her refusal to give up her seat sparked a widespread movement that ultimately led to significant changes in segregation laws.
By incorporating these suggestions, your paragraph will provide a more comprehensive and profound description of Rosa Parks' courage and her impact on society.