Posted by Mario Garcia on Thursday, February 14, 2013 at 8:16pm.
Can someone please proofread this essay?
Totalitarianism
Throughout World War 1 there were many totalitarian leaders that wanted to take over of a country. Leaders such as Stallin wanted to take over of a country forcing people to do what they told them to do. In this case Stallin took over the Soviet Union which later became Russia. There were many ways a totalitarian leader would gain total control of a country. Three ways a totalitarian leader would gain total control of a country was by using propaganda, a secret police, or through indoctrination.
Totalitarian leaders would use propaganda to gain total control of a country. They would use propaganda by using poster to sway people to accept certain beliefs or actions. These posters would have subliminal messages showing that the leaders are awesome and all the other people are bad.
Totalitarian leaders would also use a secret police to gain total control of a country. Totalitarian leaders would have the secret police spy on people and eliminate any political forces. If you didn’t do what the totalitarian leader told you to do they would have the secret police eliminate you. Also, the secrete police would monitor telephone lines, read mails, and plant informers everywhere. They would also use tanks and armored cars to stop riots.
Totalitarian leaders would also use indoctrination to gain total control of a country. They would use indoctrination by giving instructions in the government’s set of beliefs. Then they would brainwash people to do what they wanted them to do. Party leaders in the Soviet Union lectured people on the ideals of communism. They also stressed the importance of hard work and sacrifice to build the Communist state.
Throughout World War 1 leaders such as Stalling wanted to gain total control of a country. Three ways a totalitarian leader would gain total control of a country were by using propaganda, a secret police, or through indoctrination. Leaders would use propaganda by using posters to sway people to accept certain beliefs. Totalitarian leaders would also use a secret police to eliminate any political forces. Totalitarian leaders would also use indoctrination to brain wash people to do what they want them to do. These are some ways totalitarian leaders would do to gain total control of a country.
- English - Writeacher, Thursday, February 14, 2013 at 8:32pm
Before any proofing can be done, it needs heavy editing ... or maybe total reorganization and planning and writing.
You have strung together a whole bunch of generalizations and not included many details at all.
If I were scoring this on a scale of 6 (6 being best), I'd have to give it a 2. Sorry.
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