Please do not use all caps. It's considered shouting and therefore, rude.
You need Flannagan's full title.
He does not want to give teachers a 100,000 raise. Go back and read your source again.
This raise includes all Michigan teachers not just U. of M. teachers as your last line implies.
Identify Eric Scorsone
First I'd like to apologize for the caps.. But my professor told us to write in caps since it's a broadcast class and we have to write like we speak, and caps make an easier read, so that's what I did.
for number 1 I got my source from mlive,com it won't let me most the link here... but on mlive,com the headline is: State superintendent: $100,000 salary would lure more math and science teachers
OH for my last line.. the university of michigan is where he made the statement.
OK about the caps. Thanks for clarifying this.
1. You've just used the headline. You need to explain more in your news story.
3. You didn't make that detail clear.
You could do it this way:
Today during a seminar in Detroit, he compared the legislation . . .
Ok my teacher said don't start sentences with today, so would this work?:
HE COMPARED THE LEGISLATION TO A COMPLEX BOARD GAME—TODAY DURING A SEMINAR IN DETROIT—WHERE PLAYERS HAVE MULTIPLE OPTIONS FOR REACHING THE END.
also you said to identify Scorsone.. I did at the top my calling him the Local finance expert as the lead.
How about --
During a seminar in Detroit today . . .
Scorsone is usually identified as an economist.
Thanks so much for your help!! I really appreciate it
You're very welcome.
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