Please check my paragraph to see if it's good. If there any detials I should add please let me know. Also please let me know if there any grammar errors.
Obama Win
When Barack Obama was re-elected I was ecstatic. Obama is a really good president and he deserve to be president for the second term. For the past 4 years he done some great achievements. For example, he killed Osama Bin Laden. He didn't EXACTLY killed him but he ordered the United States special forces military unit to kill him. He wants to make sure everyone has access the "American Dream". For the next 4 years I just know he's going to complete his goals.
yes, I'll rephrase that.
Thank You! :)
please check my my essay okayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy please let me know if there are any wrong let me know
Your paragraph is generally well-written, but there are a few things you can consider to improve it.
1. Clarify the timing: You can mention the specific year or election in which Barack Obama was re-elected. For example, "When Barack Obama was re-elected in 20XX, I was ecstatic."
2. Use past tense consistently: Since the events you mentioned, like the killing of Osama Bin Laden, happened in the past, it would be better to use past tense consistently throughout your paragraph. For instance, you can say, "For the past 4 years, he achieved some great milestones, such as the killing of Osama Bin Laden."
3. Provide more specific achievements: While mentioning the killing of Osama Bin Laden is a notable achievement, you can include other accomplishments to support your claim that he was a good president. For example, you can mention his efforts in passing healthcare reform or his work towards economic recovery.
4. Elaborate on the "American Dream": When you mention that Obama wants to ensure everyone has access to the "American Dream," you could provide more details on what that means for you or elaborate on some policies or initiatives he implemented to achieve this goal.
5. Grammar errors: In terms of grammar, there are a few minor corrections to make. For example, instead of "he deserve," use "he deserves." Additionally, instead of "he didn't EXACTLY killed," use "he didn't EXACTLY kill."
Revised paragraph:
When Barack Obama was re-elected in 20XX, I was ecstatic. Obama proved to be a good president, deserving a second term. Over the past 4 years, he accomplished several remarkable milestones. One such achievement was the killing of Osama Bin Laden, which he ordered the United States special forces military unit to carry out. Additionally, he pursued initiatives to ensure access to the "American Dream" for everyone. From passing healthcare reform to spearheading economic recovery, Obama leaves me optimistic about his ability to accomplish his goals in the next 4 years.
Looks good.
Do you see the one small correction you should make in the second sentence?
You only need to add an "s" to "deserve."
He DESERVES to be president.