Can you proofread my writing?
Wrong Place, Wrong Time
On February 26, a 17-year-old boy named Trayvon Martin was murdered. Why? Why? Why? Was George Zimmerman defending himself or committing a hate crime? I believe George Zimmerman committed a hate crime.
One reason I say this was a hate crime is because it was a racial issue in many ways. For example, Zimmerman claimed that the boy “appeared” to be suspicious when he saw him. Then all of a sudden, Martin supposed to have attacked Zimmerman on that day. Really, why would the boy want to attack Zimmerman? That’s a question, that can’t seem to be answered. There’s no evidence!
Another reason this was a racial issue is because of the way Martin looked. Zimmerman assumed a black boy with a hoodie on, talking on his cellphone to his girlfriend was up-to-no good. I can’t believe Zimmerman would stoop this low, to say the boy looked like a criminal.
In conclusion, Zimmerman did commit a hate crime. The dispatcher told Zimmerman, “That he didn’t need him to follow the teen,” but he didn’t listen. A pow, pow from a gun went off and the boy is now dead. Zimmerman didn’t be the better man and let the boy go to his destination. If something could have possibly happened at Martin’s girlfriend house, which would have been an issue; however, we would have needed the neighborhood watch captain, Zimmerman. I feel George Zimmerman should be convicted for the crime because I felt this was a racial issue, he needs to be charged and put behind bars.
Your writing is excellent propaganda style: opinions cited as true fact, gross generalizations, and inflammatory language. Hermann Göring would be proud of you, except you didn't state "Zimmerman" is a Jewish name. But we can execute him anyway, because obviously, he thinks he is in the master race, doing all those patrols of his neighborhood.
Sometimes, we view things which we know very little of, as things with which we can make life and death judgements on the good or evil in the world, but in the end, we are foolish pawns with blood on our own hands.
Were you there? Did you actually see any of this? Or are you simply repeating what has been in the news?
How do you know "it was a racial issue"?
How do you know "There's no evidence"? Are you privy to what law enforcement in that town know?
What you've written doesn't seem to be anything but guessing and repeating what was in the news. Nothing is certain until it's been through the courts ... and sometimes not even then.
And what about all the murders all over the country? Why isn't someone protesting about them?
http://www.bet.com/news/health/2012/02/01/chicago-has-highest-murder-rate-in-the-u-s.html
http://www.chicagomag.com/Chicago-Magazine/The-312/February-2012/Chicagos-Youth-Violence-Epidemic-A-Victim-of-Success/
http://projects.latimes.com/homicide/map/
http://blog.chron.com/kuffsworld/2012/01/murder-by-numbers/
I suggest you choose a different subject.
Use the excerpt The Zimmerman Telegram, 1917 to answer the question.
What does the Zimmerman Telegram Best indicate about the influence of the United States in world affairs before World War I? Explain
A. There were no truly dependable allies for the United States during this period.
B. The United States lacked the military strength to enter into any major world conflict.
C.The United States' influence was still being determined by its reactions to foreign powers.
D. Other countries feared the influence of the United States and bent to the will of its leaders.
Answer: C. The United States' influence was still being determined by its reactions to foreign powers.
Explanation: The Zimmerman Telegram was a secret diplomatic communication issued by the German Empire in 1917 that proposed a military alliance between Germany and Mexico in the event of the United States entering World War I against Germany. Thus, it indicates that Germany was trying to determine the United States' reaction to the conflict and was testing its influence in the world affairs. The United States had not yet entered the war and its role on the global stage was still evolving, hence its influence was still being determined by its reactions to foreign powers.
Sure, I'd be happy to proofread your writing. Here is the corrected version:
Wrong Place, Wrong Time
On February 26, a 17-year-old boy named Trayvon Martin was murdered. Why? Why? Why? Was George Zimmerman defending himself or committing a hate crime? I believe George Zimmerman committed a hate crime.
One reason I say this was a hate crime is because it was a racial issue in many ways. For example, Zimmerman claimed that the boy "appeared" to be suspicious when he saw him. Then, all of a sudden, Martin is supposed to have attacked Zimmerman on that day. Really, why would the boy want to attack Zimmerman? That's a question that can't seem to be answered. There's no evidence!
Another reason this was a racial issue is because of the way Martin looked. Zimmerman assumed that a black boy with a hoodie on, talking on his cellphone to his girlfriend, was up to no good. I can't believe Zimmerman would stoop this low to say the boy looked like a criminal.
In conclusion, Zimmerman did commit a hate crime. The dispatcher told Zimmerman that he didn't need him to follow the teen, but he didn't listen. A gunshot went off, and the boy is now dead. Zimmerman didn't act like the better man and let the boy go to his destination. If something could have possibly happened at Martin's girlfriend's house, which would have been an issue, we would have needed the neighborhood watch captain, Zimmerman. I believe George Zimmerman should be convicted for the crime because I felt this was a racial issue, and he needs to be charged and put behind bars.
I have made some corrections and improvements to your writing. It's important to ensure clarity and coherence in your essay. Additionally, when making a claim, it's crucial to provide evidence and logical reasoning to support your position.