posted by Matthew on .
I urgently need you to check these sentences. Thank you very much.
1) “Pamela” is an epistolary novel, that is a collection of letters written by a virtuous girl, Pamela Andrews, to her parents. The plot is very simple and built around the interrelation between the two main characters, Pamela and Mr B.
2) Fifteen-year-old Pamela Andrews has been the servant girl of Lady B. for many years. When the noblewoman dies, Pamela is sad. She loved Lady B because she had given her an education far beyond her means.
3) Mr B., Lady B’s son, offers to let her remain in the household, and Pamela accepts with gratitude. However, it soon becomes clear that Mr B. intends to seduce her.
4) He then offers to send her home to her parents, but the coachman, who is one of Mr B.’s men, drives her instead to Mr.B’s country house, where she is virtually a prisoner. The girl, however, resists all her master’s advances protecting virtue.
5) She gains from him, as a reward, a proposal of marriage which she accepts, becoming rich and improving her social status.
1. Novels' titles belong in italics, not in quotation marks.
2. Clarify who "she" and "her" are.
4. She is "virtually" a prisoner? Or she is really a prisoner? Could she leave?
... protecting her virtue.
5. Awkward and reads funny. Move "as a reward" to the beginning of the sentence so it doesn't interrupt the verb and the direct object.
Is this a good paragraph and do you think it flows well? Thank you very much! "It is my nature to be punctilious and manifest a rectitude of judgment consistent with the teachings of my parents. However, when a person convinces me he will honor his promise and I later realize his promise was fallacious, provokes a bellicose passion."