Homework Help: poetry, please comment

Posted by i♥zee on Wednesday, March 28, 2012 at 11:19pm.

The Abuse Ends Now by: Kathy A

I wasn't enough
So he became rough
I'm just not that tough
As he was handcuffed I saw his face
I hoped he knew he was a disgrace

After all this time of looking into those deceiving blue eyes
I just sit and cry
Because of every single lie
The last words he said to me were "Why don't you just die"
But I know his type
From now on
I'll just hide from the guys on "his side"

How does this one sound...... I just want hones opinions please. If you hate say you hate it, if you like it say you like it. Thanks to any and all comments. (I am only 12, so.)

poetry, please comment - Jessica, Wednesday, March 28, 2012 at 11:36pm
I like the theme but your rhyme scheme is throwing me off. Why don't you try rhyming the last two words of each stanza instead. Just because it's a poem doesn't mean it has to rhyme. Hope this helps :)
poetry, please comment - TJK, Sunday, April 22, 2012 at 8:52pm
I love it. Its got a great theme. The rhyme scheme isn't bad. Each person's speech has their own unique rhythm. I like your work; this one and the other one you did (Still So New To You). Your poetry has a certain feel to it. It's almost musical. I look forward to seeing what else you post.

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