posted by Matthew on .
Can you please check these other sentences? Thank you very much.
1) Robinson makes Friday a slave. He calls him Friday because of the day the savage was saved. Better: after the day he is rescued/after the day of his rescue.
2) There were specific references to the names of countries, streets and towns, and also the interiors were described in detail.
3) Using the pen and the ink that he has found (better finds) on the ship, Robinson starts writing a diary to mantain an ideal contact with his motherland.
4) The writer had to write in a simple way, so that he could be understood also by less well educated readers.
5) He starts a goat farm (not goats' farm) because he realizes that his gunpowder is running out.
1. I'd choose "because of the day he was rescued."
2. "and also" is redundant. Try this:
... streets, and towns; in addition, the interiors ...
3. Yes, "finds" -- all else is OK.
4. I'd phrase it differently: His writing style was very simple, so that he ...
5. "goat farm" << yes