Writeacher, I left out an email I need to write to a school's principal. I really need to "persuade" him to start a school exchange programme. I wonder if you could help me check it. I didn't include tje presentation of the school because you have already checked it.
Our school has about 800 students and is situated in a hilly area, about 60 kms from ......, in northern ..... Our town is world renowned for its production of red wines and white truffles etc.....
1) The principal of our school is looking for an Irish school , which is interested in a long-term cooperative project with our school. We have already established a link with both a German and a French schools, with which we will hopefully work on a two-year Comenius science project starting from year 2012-20013.
2) It would be extremely important for us, if our students could have the chance to start an email partnership followed by a student exchange programme with your students.
3) This initial partnership could lead to both students' and teachers' mobilities ( mobility: the chance to spend some time at a school abroad and have it recognized) in the near future.
4) The students involved will be high-achievers belonging to classes ten and eleven.
5) We are all looking forward to receiving a positive reply from you.
Best regards.
I think I need to be more convincing.
1) The principal of our school is looking for an Irish school, which is interested in a long-term cooperative project with our school. We have already established a link with a German and a French school, with which we will hopefully work on a two-year Comenius science project starting from academic year 2012-2013.
2) It would be extremely helpful for us, if our students had the chance to start an email partnership followed by a student exchange programme with your students.
3) This initial partnership could lead to both student- and teacher-exchanges in the near future.
(Take a look at suspended hyphens here: http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/marks/hyphen.htm )
4) The students involved will be high-achievers belonging to classes ten and eleven.
5) We are all looking forward to receiving a positive reply from you.
Subject: Proposal for School Exchange Program - Enhancing Cultural Understanding and Global Education
Dear Principal [Principal's Name],
I hope this email finds you well. I am writing to you on behalf of [Your School Name] to discuss a proposal for a school exchange program between our institutions. After thoroughly researching your school and understanding its commitment to providing quality education, we believe that establishing a long-term cooperative project with your esteemed institution would greatly benefit our students and foster cultural understanding.
Allow me to provide you with some background about our school. Situated in a picturesque hilly area, approximately 60 kilometers from the bustling city of [City Name] in northern [Country Name], [Your School Name] is home to a vibrant community of approximately 800 students. Our town is globally renowned for its production of red wines and white truffles, making it an enticing destination for cultural exploration and academic endeavors.
We are proud to share that [Your School Name] has already established fruitful collaborations with both a German and a French school. By actively participating in a two-year Comenius science project starting from the academic year 2012-2013, our students have gained invaluable experiences in intercultural learning and scientific inquiry. Building on this success, we enthusiastically seek to extend our reach and engage in an email partnership followed by a student exchange program with your esteemed institution.
Here are a few compelling reasons why we believe this partnership would be mutually beneficial:
1) Cultural Exchange: By initiating an email partnership, our students will have the opportunity to communicate and connect with your students. This virtual exchange will foster cultural understanding, promote empathy, and enhance their global perspective, ultimately preparing them to thrive in an increasingly interconnected world.
2) Student Empowerment: We firmly believe that physical experiences and immersion hold immense potential for personal and academic growth. A student exchange program would allow our high-achieving students, belonging to classes ten and eleven, to immerse themselves in a new educational environment, experience a different culture firsthand, and broaden their horizons. These experiences will shape their understanding of diversity, independence, and cross-cultural collaboration.
3) Educational Collaborations: By nurturing this initial partnership, we envision that both students and teachers from our institutions will have the opportunity to participate in future mobilities. These experiences will provide a chance to explore different pedagogical approaches, exchange best practices, and share innovative ideas, ultimately enriching our educational communities.
We eagerly await your response and sincerely hope to receive your support and interest in this extraordinary opportunity to enhance our students' education and cultural awareness. Should you have any further inquiries or require additional details, please do not hesitate to reach out to us.
Thank you for your time and consideration. We truly appreciate your commitment to providing an inclusive and globally-oriented educational experience for your students.
Best regards,
[Your Name]
[Your Title/Position]
[Your School Name]