Can anyone help me with these. I need to
eliminate unnecessary shifts in tense, mood, voice, or person.
1)The greed of the 1980’s gave way to the occupational insecurity of the 1990’s, which in turn gave way to reinforced family ties in the early 2000’s.
A) Greed in the 1980’s led to occupational insecurity in the 1990’s which reinforced family ties in the 2000’s.
2)The building inspector suggested that we apply for a construction permit and that we should check with his office again when the plans are complete.
A) The building inspector suggested that we apply for a construction permit and check back with his office again when the plans are complete.
3)The instructor grabbed her coat, wondered why was the substitute late, and ran out of the room.
A) The instructor grabbed her coat, while running out of the room wondering why the substitute was late.
4)Suddenly, we heard an explosion of wings off to our right, and you could see a hundred or more ducks lifting off from the water.
A) Suddenly, we heard an explosion of wings off to our right; we could see a hundred or more ducks lifting off from the water.
I would correct the suggested sentences in the following way:
1. The greed of the 1980’s led the occupational insecurity of the 1990’s that reinforced family ties in the early 2000’s.
2. The building inspector suggested us to apply for a construction permit and check with his office again when the plans would be complete.
3. The instructor grabbed her coat and ran out of the room, wondering why the substitute was late
4. Suddenly, we heard an explosion of wings off to our right, and saw a hundred or more ducks lifting off from the water.
Sure! I can help you with these sentences.
1) Original sentence: The greed of the 1980’s gave way to the occupational insecurity of the 1990’s, which in turn gave way to reinforced family ties in the early 2000’s.
To eliminate unnecessary shifts in tense, mood, voice, or person, we can revise the sentence as follows:
Revised sentence: Greed in the 1980’s led to occupational insecurity in the 1990’s which reinforced family ties in the 2000’s.
2) Original sentence: The building inspector suggested that we apply for a construction permit and that we should check with his office again when the plans are complete.
To eliminate unnecessary shifts in tense, mood, voice, or person, we can revise the sentence as follows:
Revised sentence: The building inspector suggested that we apply for a construction permit and check back with his office again when the plans are complete.
3) Original sentence: The instructor grabbed her coat, wondered why was the substitute late, and ran out of the room.
To eliminate unnecessary shifts in tense, mood, voice, or person, we can revise the sentence as follows:
Revised sentence: The instructor grabbed her coat, while running out of the room wondering why the substitute was late.
4) Original sentence: Suddenly, we heard an explosion of wings off to our right, and you could see a hundred or more ducks lifting off from the water.
To eliminate unnecessary shifts in tense, mood, voice, or person, we can revise the sentence as follows:
Revised sentence: Suddenly, we heard an explosion of wings off to our right; we could see a hundred or more ducks lifting off from the water.
By identifying the shifts in tense, mood, voice, or person and making the necessary revisions, you can eliminate the unnecessary shifts in your sentences.