Homework Help: english

Posted by dakota on Sunday, November 13, 2011 at 9:37pm.

Is this a good paragraph with correct grammar? The Grilled Cheese Memorial and Museum is an interesting and educational place to visit. It is located in Elmwood, IL. There are many exhibits in the museum. The exhibits show all different varieties of cheeses and breads which can be used to make a grilled cheese. At one exhibit you can make your own personal grilled cheese. Another exhibit shows how important cheese can be for our bodies. After a visit to the Grilled Cheese Memorial, you will realize the importance of a grilled cheese.

english - Maria, Sunday, November 13, 2011 at 9:41pm
The sentence "The exhibits show all different varieties of cheeses and breads..." I believe contains an error. In that sentence, since you have made the word "variety" plural, you should not have s's after cheese and and bread.
In other words, it should read "The exhibits show all different varieties of cheese and bread which..."
English - Ms. Sue, Sunday, November 13, 2011 at 9:42pm
Yes, this is good and it's correct.

The only thing I'd add is to add the word sandwich to the end of this sentence:

The exhibits show all different varieties of cheeses and breads which can be used to make a grilled cheese sandwich.
English - Writeacher, Sunday, November 13, 2011 at 9:43pm
The Grilled Cheese Memorial and Museum is an interesting and educational place to visit. It is located in Elmwood, IL.<~~How can you smoothly combine those first two sentences? There are many exhibits in the museum. The exhibits show all different varieties of cheeses and breads which can be used to make a grilled cheese<~~"a grilled cheese" what?. At one exhibit you can make your own personal grilled cheese<~~??. Another exhibit shows how important cheese can be for our bodies. After a visit to the Grilled Cheese Memorial, you will realize the importance of a grilled cheese<~~??.

You have used both 1st and 2nd person in the paragraph. It would be better if you used one, but not both

1st person = I, me, we, us, ...
2nd person = all forms of "you"
http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/composition/subject_object.htm
English - Ms. Sue, Sunday, November 13, 2011 at 9:44pm
I disagree with Maria. Cheeses indicates various kinds of cheese -- cheddar, Swiss, Havarti, Edam, etc.

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