February 25, 2017

Homework Help: writing sentences and paragraph

Posted by louise on Tuesday, November 8, 2011 at 2:18pm.

i need help on my assignment , please correct where i am wrong .


You’ve applied for a specific job in your field of study. The Human Resources Department arranges an interview and tells you to bring with you a polished piece of writing for them to evaluate your writing
skills. The paragraph must describe one particular experience you’ve had that inspired you or guided
you to choose the type of position for which you applied.

Your audience is your potential employer and your purpose is to show you have thought carefully about what and/or who has motivated you toward this career choice and why. In addition, you want
to convey your enthusiasm for this position as it relates to your inspiring experience.

This is what i have prepared:-

I am applying for the medical assistant position now available in your Fawcett Memorial Hospital at Newark, FL. I have 2 years of experience working as a volunteer to medical assistant, where, I enjoyed the versatility of medical assisting. I like working directly with patients, and Working with patients who absolutely adore me definitely motivates me to provide excellent care. I've worked with some elderly women who told me that they preferred my blood draws over others because I'm so gentle. Blood draws can be very painful, and they gave me a great feedback. When I worked for a doctor whose specialty was hepatology, I did medication side effect management with patients who were discouraged because the medication they were taking was making them feel sick, they needed someone to understand and listen to them. They felt they could talk to me more easily than the doctor. Sometimes, I had the time to make them feel comfortable. I had a patient cry when I left that job, she said, "I want to hear my results from you." As a medical assistant it's easy to build relationships with the patients and you get to learn every day, from your patients as well as your co-workers. I had such a nice time working with patients that I decided to get degree in medical assistant. I feel my qualification, experience and skills of being organized, respectful, and multi-tasking and caring makes me a good fit for this position.

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