Posted by manal on Wednesday, October 26, 2011 at 6:29am.
I tried to re-write the essay please check it for me again .
Thank you Sra
Antigone and Whale Rider
In the play Antigone by Sophocles and movie whale rider directed by Caro. The two characters are Paikea and Antigone both has similarities in common. Both are considered Heros because they go through hardships.
First, Antigone has a conflict with her uncle Creon after her brother’s death, Creon became the king. The conflict between Antigone and Creon was that she wants to bury her brother Polynices, Creon made a law that who buries Polynices will be killed. Antigone fate that she was caught by the guards “the girl was burying him as simple as that” (Sophocles11). This shows us that her uncle was angry and strict and will punish her and there is a conflict between her and Creon. Likewise In the movie whale rider Piakea has a conflict with her grandfather Koro. The conflict was that Piakea was the new chief but her grandfather Koro did not accept her as a chief because girl’s can nott be wise leaders always putting her down and does not want her to join boys school to learn about their traditions and old culture he refuses everything from her. Both the play and the movie are significant because they both have a conflict with a close relative Pia with her Grandfather Koro and Antigone with her uncle Creon they go through hardships.
Secondly, in the play Anitgone was considered a hero in front of Thebes city because she buried her brother Polyncies Antigone has a tragic downfall. Therefore she respected the God’s law, “the people of Thebes do not call it a disease” (19). This shows that people of Thebes think of her that she’s a hero and deserve to live. In the same way, Piakea is considered a hero in front of the village because she saved the whales that where beached at the sea shore, Piakea was the new chief and whale rider. Hence, she saved the whales, she got sick, and put her life in danger and therefore, she is considered a tragic hero. This is significant because both were considered heros and everyone is proud of them in the movie the whale rider Koro told Piakea that she is “wise leader”(Caro) and Antigone had a downfall and was killed .
In Antigone she had people defending her, Ismene and Haemon. When Antigone was caught her sister Ismene was defending her telling Creon that she will die with her sister “to die with you for Polyncies sake?”(14). Haemon was defending Antigone and told his father Creon that she is a hero and the people of Thebes think of her the same “the people of Thebes don’t call it a disease”(19). This clearly shows us that these two people are defending her and loving Antigone. Similarly to the movie her grandmother (Nanny) Flowers were always defending her“when her grandfather saw her at school when they reached home he was angry and her grandmother was defending Piakea and told him that she was watching” (Caro). Therefore, her grandmother is defending her because she loves her and sees her as a hero. This is significant because both have people defending them, and helping to solve their conflicts and hardships.
In conclusion, they both have conflicts with a close relative, two of them considered heros in the eyes of people, and having people defending and helping them to solve their problems. They have tragic downfall in Antigone being killed and Whale rider Piakea puts her life in danger.
literary - Writeacher, Wednesday, October 26, 2011 at 7:32am
I'll deal with the first parts of your paper. Then you need to go through it to find similar errors and fix them.
Antigone and Whale Rider
These are titles of the original works. You need to create your own title. Don't use other writers' titles.
In the play Antigone by Sophocles and movie whale rider directed by Caro.
This is a fragment, not a complete sentence. It has no verb. Make it a complete sentence or connect it correctly to the sentence which follows.
The two characters are Paikea and Antigone both has similarities in common.
This is a run-on (two sentences run together without correct punctuation, etc.) How will you fix this?
Both are considered Heros because they go through hardships.
Watch spelling and capitalization. You should have "heroes" -- and it would be better to use the word "experience" rather than "go through".
First, Antigone has a conflict with her uncle Creon after her brother’s death, Creon became the king.
Another run-on. How will you fix this?
The conflict between Antigone and Creon was that she wants to bury her brother Polynices, Creon made a law that who buries Polynices will be killed.
Antigone fate that she was caught by the guards “the girl was burying him as simple as that” (Sophocles11).
You quoted and cited almost correctly; just put a space after Sophocles, before 11. However that is not a complete sentence; it's another fragment. In addition, Antigone is possessive (she 'owns' her fate), and should be Antigone's.
These types of errors are all through your paper. Please go through VERY CAREFULLY and find and fix all of them -- run-ons, fragments, spelling, capitalization, and possessive errors.
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