I have to write a comparative essay please review it for me thank you.

Antigone and Whale Rider
In the play Antigone by Sophocles and movie whale rider directed by Caro. The two characters are Paikea and Antigone they both have similarities in common .Both are considered Hero’s because they go through hardship .
First , Antigone has a conflict with her uncle Creon after her brother’s death, Creon became the king . The conflict between Antigone and Creon was that she want to bury her brother Polynices, Creon made a law that who buries Polynices will be killed . Antigone fate that she was caught by the guards “the girl was burying him. As simple as that”(Sophocles11). This show us that her uncle was angry and strict and will punish her and there is a conflict between her and Creon. Likewise In the movie whale rider Piakea has a conflict with her grandfather Koro. The conflict was that Piakea was the new chief but her grandfather Koro didn’t accept her as a chief because girl’s can’t be wise leaders always putting her down and doesn’t want her to join boys school to learn about their traditions and old culture he refuse’s everything from her. Both the play and the movie are significant because they both have a conflict with a close relative Pia with her Grandfather Koro and Antigone with her uncle Creon they go through hardship.
Secondly , In the play Anitgone was considered a hero in front of Thebes city because she buried her brother Polyncies Antigone has a tragic downfall . Therefore she respected the gods law, “the people of Thebes don’t call it a disease”(19). This show us that the people of Thebes thinks of her that she’s a hero a deserve to live. In the same way, Piakea is considered a hero in front of the village because she saved the whales that where beached at the sea shore ,Piakea was the new chief and whale rider. Hence, she saved the whales and she got sick and put her life in danger she is considered a tragic hero. This is significant because they both were considered hero’s and everyone is proud of them in the movie the whale rider Koro told to Piakea that she is “wise leader”(Caro) and Antigone had a downfall she was killed .
In Antigone she had people defending her Ismene and Haemon . When Antigone was caught her sister Ismene was defending her and telling to Creon that she will die with her sister “to die with you for Polyncies sake?”(14). Haemon was defending Antigone and told his father Creon that she is an hero and the people of Thebes thinks of her the same “the people of Thebes don’t call it a disease”(19). This clearly shows us that these two people are defending her and loving Antigone .Similarly to the movie her grandmother (Nanny) Flowers was always defending her “ when her grandfather saw her at school when they reached home he was angry and her grandmother was defending Piakea and told him that she was watching”(Caro). Therefore, her grandmother is defending her because she loves her and see her as an hero . This is significant because both have people defending them ,helping them to solve their conflicts and hardships .
In conclusion , they both have conflicts with a close relative , two of them are considered hero’s in the eyes of the people , and having people defending and helping them to solve their problems . they have tragic downfall in Antigone being kill and Whale rider Piakea put’s her life in danger .

Paikea and Antigone they both have similarities in common = delete "they" = P & A both have...

considered Hero’s = Heros (not possessive)... hardships (plural)

and telling to Creon = delete "to" = telling Creon

she is an hero = she is a hero (or heroine)

"This show us that the people of Thebes thinks of her that she’s a hero a deserve to live." = people is plursl = This shows us......people think...and deserves to live?

wales that were beached (spelling error)

either God's OR Gods'

nd see her as an hero . = and sees her as a hero

I notice you leve a space between a word and the comma or period. No, there is no space.

They (capitalized) or better yet "There is a tragic downfall in Antigone being killed and in Whale Rider because Piakea puts (no hyphen) her life in danger.

If you have time, I would suggest making ALL the corrections and reposting for final proofreading.

Sra

Sra thank you very much for yr quick response I really appreciated.

No problem I have enough time .

Thanks again

Overall, your comparative essay on Antigone and Whale Rider is well-structured and offers a clear analysis of the similarities between the two characters. Here are a few suggestions for improvement:

1. Introduction:
- Consider adding a brief overview of the plots of both Antigone and Whale Rider to give readers some context before diving into the similarities between the characters.

2. Body paragraphs:
- In the first body paragraph, you can provide more specific evidence to support your point about Antigone's conflict with Creon. For example, you could mention how Antigone confronts Creon directly and argues for the importance of burying her brother. This will help to emphasize the strong contrast between Antigone's actions and Creon's strict laws.
- Similarly, in the paragraph discussing Whale Rider, you could provide more details about how Paikea challenges her grandfather's beliefs and fights for her right to be the new chief. Including specific scenes or dialogue from the film would strengthen your analysis.

3. Quotation analysis:
- When analyzing quotations, try to go beyond simply summarizing what they say. Instead, provide more insight by discussing the significance or impact of the quoted lines. For example, in the paragraph about Antigone being considered a hero, you can elaborate on how the support of the people of Thebes reflects their recognition of her bravery.

4. Conclusion:
- Your conclusion effectively summarizes the main points of your essay. However, it would be beneficial to add a sentence or two that offers a broader reflection on the significance of the similarities between the two characters. This would provide a more satisfying conclusion to your essay.

Overall, your essay presents a clear and concise analysis of the similarities between Antigone and Paikea. With a few adjustments and more specific evidence, it will become a strong comparative essay.

Sure, I can review your comparative essay for you. Here are a few suggestions for improvement:

1. Start by providing a brief introduction to the two works you are comparing - "Antigone" by Sophocles (play) and "Whale Rider" directed by Caro (movie). This will help set the context for the essay.

2. Clearly state your thesis statement in the introduction, which should outline the main points of comparison between the two characters and their hardships.

3. Throughout the essay, make sure to provide evidence from the texts to support your arguments. For example, when discussing Antigone, you mention that she wants to bury her brother despite the law, but you can also explore why she feels the need to do so and how it connects to her beliefs/values.

4. Consider incorporating more analysis and interpretation of the texts. For instance, why is it significant that both Antigone and Paikea have conflicts with their close relatives? How does this impact their characterization and the overall themes of the works?

5. Use transition words and phrases to create smoother connections between your ideas. For example, instead of starting a new paragraph with "Secondly," you can use phrases like "In addition" or "Furthermore" to signal the continuation of your argument.

6. Revise and proofread the essay for grammar and spelling errors. For instance, in your conclusion, you wrote "put's" instead of "puts."

Overall, your essay presents a good foundation, but with some revisions and additional analysis, it could become a stronger comparison. Good luck with your writing!