I tried to rephrase these lines from S's Macbeth, again. Could you please have a look at them and help me with them?

1) Macbeth: "Methought I heard a voice cry, “Sleep no more! Macbeth does murder sleep”—the innocent sleep,Sleep that knits up the raveled sleave of care,The death of each day’s life, sore labor’s bath,Balm of hurt minds, great nature’s second course,Chief nourisher in life’s feast."

1) Sleep knits up the "ravelled sleave" of care. Shakespeare uses this metaphor to stress the fact that it is sleep which removes our cares.
Sleep comes at the end of each day, it happens in darkness, it is like a little death.
2) "Sore labour's bath" means that sleep brings relief to bodies aching from hard work as do baths. The body has a chance to relax and recover from injury.
3) "Balm of hurt minds" relates to the same thing but mentally. Sleep refreshes the mind as is does the body.
4) The final section relates to the fact that without sleep, we would die. It nourishes us and gives us life and energy as does the second (and more important) course at a meal. It is essential and life giving.

1) Sleep knits up the "ravelled sleave" of care. Shakespeare uses this metaphor to stress the fact that it is sleep which removes our cares. <~~This is fine.

Sleep comes at the end of each day, it happens in darkness, it is like a little death. <~~There are run-ons here -- sentences run together without correct punctuation. How will you fix it?

2) "Sore labour's bath" means that sleep brings relief to bodies aching from hard work as do baths. The body has a chance to relax and recover from injury. <~~This is fine.

3) "Balm of hurt minds" relates to the same thing<~~Add comma. but mentally. Sleep refreshes the mind as is<~~delete "is" does the body.

4) The final section relates to the fact that without sleep, we would die. It nourishes us and gives us life and energy as does the second (and more important) course at a meal. It is essential and life giving. <~~This is fine.

Sleep refreshes the mind as it does the body.

1) Your explanation of the first line is correct. Shakespeare is using the metaphor of sleep as a "raveled sleave" that knits up or repairs our worries and cares. It is the act of sleeping that allows us to let go of our troubles.

2) "Sore labour's bath" signifies that sleep provides relief and refreshment to our tired bodies, just as a bath can soothe and rejuvenate us. It gives us a chance to rest and recover from the physical strain and exhaustion caused by hard work.

3) The phrase "Balm of hurt minds" refers to how sleep can also heal and soothe our troubled minds. Just as a balm can provide comfort and alleviate pain, sleep acts as a remedy for the mental burdens and troubles we might be experiencing.

4) The final section of the passage emphasizes the vital importance of sleep for our survival. Without sleep, we would not be able to sustain ourselves and our energies would become depleted. Comparing sleep to the chief nourisher in a feast highlights its essential role in providing us with life, energy, and sustenance. It completes the analogy by alluding to the fact that just as a meal consists of multiple courses, sleep is a crucial part of our existence.