Homework Help: English

Posted by Henry2 on Sunday, October 2, 2011 at 4:52pm.

I urgently need you to check this paragaph. Thank you very much!!

1) Sybil Vane is an actress Dorian meets in an absurd theatre in the East End of London. Lord Henry is pleased with Dorian’s sudden love for Sybil Vane because it makes his creation more interesting to study.
2) Sybil is a girl, not yet seventeen, with a face like a flower, dark-brown hair and passionate violet eyes. She is trusting, sincere and passionate –the antithesis to Lord Henry.
3) She is the loveliest thing Dorian had (has) ever seen. She lives with her mother, a retired actress. Dorian admits Sybil is the only thing he cares about.
4) One day, however, Dorian goes to see her performance with Lord Henry and Basil and they are all disappointed by her acting. Dorian notices that the girl is strangely lifeless and her words sound artificial and meaningless. 5) Her tone is false and unnatural. Her acting lacks passion and vitality. Lord Henry gets up and says that she is very beautiful but she can't act.
6) Then he and Basil leaves the theatre. After the performance Sybil admits that before meeting him acting was the only reality of her life.

English - Writeacher, Sunday, October 2, 2011 at 5:01pm
1. ... in a shabby theater ... OR ... in a dingy theater ...

3. has

4. commas needed

5. comma needed

6. check verb form (plural?)
comma needed

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