posted by Henry2 on .
I realized I sent you the same sentences twice. Here are my corrections.
1)Arthur said that the Graal was where Christ’s blood was kept after Christ had been crucified. Two knights soon declared they were prepared to look for the Grail for one year and one day.
2) In 537 Arthur had to go to distant lands to fight. He asked a knight named Mordred to rule his land until he returned. Arthur trusted Mordred because he knew he was a loyal man. However, Mordred told everyone that Arthur had been killed in the war, in France.
3) When King Arthur heard the news, he got furious and fought a long battle against Mordred.
4) Though King Arthur managed to kill Mordred with his spear, he was in turn mortally wounded by Mordred’s sword, which went through Arthur’s helmet and hit Arthur’s head.
5) When Arthur was on the point of dying, he called Sir Bedivere and ordered him to bring his sword Excalibur back to the Lady of the Lake. 6) As requested, Sir Bedivere went to the lake and threw the sword far into the water.
7)On Sir Bedivere’s return, Arthur thanked him and asked to be carried to the lake. Sir Bedivere obeyed and put him in a boat.
8) Though his servant tried to dissuade him from leaving, Arthur replied that he was going to Avalon because his life was near the end.
1. Grail (not Graal); " ... for a year and a day."
2. Add one comma; delete one comma.
3. Use "became" rather than "got."
5. Delete "on the point of"
6 - 8. OK