Posted by failgrammar on Monday, July 11, 2011 at 12:56pm.
I think one reason is that there are a lot of grammatical errors.
so that's one ok
First of all, shame on the teacher who didn't tell you why. How do you expect to get better if no one tells you where you went wrong?!! I'll check the mechanics (or grammar) for you.
You simply say "the article" and the reader has no idea what article that is. I assume what you have in quotes is the title of the article, but look again at what should be capitalized.
Why have you capitalized Men and Women in some places? "and vocalize what they feel." (note I changed the wording a bit.)
Drop were "according to the article." You could take 2 simple sentences and combine them into a complex sentence, as in this example: Women have face-to-face friendships and are vocal when sharing their problems to ("with" rather than "to") their friends. As a result (those 2 words are NOT a sentence), they develop......(etc.)
Always proofread to catch anything like this error: "t5he " = the...men rely (plural subject = plural verb)
Depending upon where you are (American vs British/Australian English) the comma might go inside the quote.
...friendship relationships, women are better.....feedback (singular noun, not plural)
There is that capital W again for "women"....from women." or from women". depending upon where you are. (American English vs. British English punctuation) That is a sentence unless you use a semi-colon, for example and then women would be lower case (not capital)
before herself. (talking about mothers)
...are realiable in that they can...
No one (is singular) so not "their" but "his/her" ...improtant to everyone's life and they can learn from each other.
I find no fault with what you have to say, but spelling, punctuation, connectors need work. Perhaps English is not your native language. However, I don't know anything about the level of English you are studying.
When I give a student (or students) a prompt (something to write on), they also know the rubric I will use to score the papers. In my opinion, students have a right to know the basis of the grade(s) they receive. If you suggest that nicely to your teacher, that might happen for your next essay. Don't be afraid to ask for extra help before or after class, especially WHY you received an F so you can do better the next time.
According to the article, “women have a higher quality when it comes to relationship than men”.
What is the name of this article? If it's what you enclosed in quotes, then the key words should be capitalized. It also makes this an incomplete sentence. If not, then why use the quotes? Relationships should be plural.
First of all, “Women have a deeper relationship than men”, were according to article.
What do you mean by were?
Women are vocal when sharing their problems to their friends.
According to t5he article “In surveys, men routinely list their spouses as their best friends”, men relies on women to fulfill their emotional needs.
needs a comma
comma is misplaced
subject and verb don't agree (men relies)
How can you expect someone else to read this when you didn't even bother to proofread it?
calling miss sue and sarah - I'm on college. this is for English 101. She ...
English, Critical Thinking - PLEASE HELP. I have this essay due tomorrow. I need...
english 101 - Some would argue that women are better friends than men. Those ...
Please proofread my essay - Could you please proofread my essay. Please check ...
English - I am writing an essay about James Baldwin's Go Tell It on the ...
English - Whats the difference between honoring women vs honoring women of. ...
english - What is wrong with these sentences then? I have been reading and ...
English - Can anyone check my essay? I could send the rubric for scoring. Thanks...
English - 1. I have a friend who goes biking many times. 2. I have a friend who ...
english essay - a friend in need is a friend indeed
For Further Reading