posted by Cherrel on .
I had to write an compare and contrast essay, but somewhere down the line I got lost. Can someone help me please... Here's what I already have...
Into day’s society, online social networking has provided a variety of advantages and disadvantages. The use of today’s technology results in an alternative to the traditional styles of going about our daily activities, which can be both positively and negative. Having the option to communicate via the internet provides a better way of continuing your education without actually attending a traditional classroom. The digital world and the traditional world are constantly at odds, with both providing their own benefits and disadvantages.
The internet has advanced a great deal over the years. People are able to apply for assistance to continuing their education. These days in time a person can earn their degree online from many different schools, which offers the option of online education as an alternative to a traditional classroom education. The option has become extremely popular for students all over the world.
There are many benefits from working towards a degree online. When someone is trying to complete multiple tasks such as; working a job, attending a traditional school and/or taking care of family members it maybe overwhelming. With online education, a person is able to complete assignments via the internet. This is far most the best benefit, because a person doesn’t have to commute to school. Most schools allow their students to complete assignments anytime of the day, as long as they meet their deadlines. It’s also more convenient, because getting your education is more flexible.
Many may argue can a traditional education actually be compared to an online education? There are several individuals that may respond yes. Not only can online learning be an encouraging environment, it also allows every student to have an equal opportunity to participate in the discussions. Online education programs allow each student to learn the way that they know best.
Although traditional classrooms will never fade away, there has definitely been an increase in the amount of students who prefer to receive their education online.
Take the ideas you have and isolate them. I see many sentences that just BEG for detailed explanations, but there are none. So in a sense, you'll need to start over from the planning stage.
Whenever you are writing a comparison/contrast paper (paragraph, essay, research paper), you need to plan it out very carefully on paper first.
1. List all the main points and details for each main point for one of your topics on one page.
2. List all the main points and details for each main point about the other topic on another page.
3. Then put them together in this order:
1. Intro <~~Write this next-to-last.
2. All about topic A
~~~2A. detail 1
~~~2B. detail 2
~~~2C. detail 3
~~~2D. detail 4
~~~2E. detail 5
3. All about topic B
~~~3A. detail 1
~~~3B. detail 2
~~~3C. detail 3
~~~3D. detail 4
~~~3E. detail 5
4. Concl. <~~Write this last.
The number of details for each topic will vary depending on your main points. I would include comparisons (how they are similar) in the introduction and conclusion, but sections 2 and 3 and all those details will be stating and explaining how they are different.
There are two recognized patterns for writing comparison/contrast papers. One is casually referred to as "zig-zag,â€ but can be very confusing for the reader if you donâ€™t use transitions effectively. The other is topic-by-topic (which is what I've outlined above) and is much easier for the reader to follow.
See http://leo.stcloudstate.edu/acadwrite/comparcontrast.html for further help with comparison/contrast writing.
Once you have organized your information, please re-post if youâ€™d like feedback from someone here.
Specific errors or omissions I see:
In today's society, online social networking has provided a variety of advantages and disadvantages. Needs details to explain this statement.
The use of today's technology results in alternatives to the traditional styles of going about our daily activities, which can be both positive and negative. This is another topic sentence in that it cries out for examples!! (I also corrected some spelling and other things.)
Having the option to communicate via the internet provides a better way of continuing your education without actually attending a traditional classroom. And here's a third topic that desperately needs explanation and proof. (How do you prove that online schooling is "a better way" than in normal classrooms?)
The digital world and the traditional world are constantly at odds, with both providing their own benefits and disadvantages. This undoubtedly belongs with the second topic sentence above, but it's just a rephrasing of it; there is no further explanation here, no details, no examples.
The internet has advanced a great deal over the years. More repetition of what you've already written.
People are able to apply for assistance to continuing their education. This is an example that needs more details and explanation -- it also needs to go with one of the topic sentences above.
These days in time <~~what? a person can earn their<~~agreement error degree online from many different schools, which offerssubj/verb agreement error the option of online education as an alternative to a traditional classroom education.This is again a repeat of one statement you've already made, but you haven't added any additional facts here.
The option has become extremely popular for students all over the world. Another statement -- no back-up.
You never went back to the "social networking" topic. Almost the entire paper is fluff, and it jumps around, back and forth. Only at the end do you seem to start getting down to some details to back up your position.
I also cannot identify your thesis statement.