Posted by Marie on Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 9:27pm.
What is the best way to revise this sentence?
Sometimes a purchase doesn't live up to all the things it's advertising says about it.
A. Sometimes a purchase doesn't live up to what it says.
B. Somestimes a purchase doesn't live up to it's advertising.
C. Sometimes a purchase does live up to all the things that it says.
D. Sometimes a purchase doesn't love up to all it's advertising about it?
English - Writeacher, Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 9:40pm
#1 - None of the sentences are correct because the word should be "its" not "it's" -- the second of which is a contraction meaning "it is."
#2 - Go through all of them and make sure every instance of "it" or "its" makes a clear reference to a noun earlier in the sentence. If it's not clear what "it" is referring to, then that sentence is incorrect.
Please repost and let us know what you think.
English - Marie, Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 9:49pm
yes they are "it" sorry I put "it's" by accident
English - Writeacher, Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 9:56pm
A and C are not good because of the word "says." Does the purchase talk?
So -- which is better? B or D?
English - Marie, Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 10:05pm
I believe D
English - Ms. Sue, Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 10:14pm
I disagree. B. says the same thing, but in fewer words. The words "about it" are redundant.
English - Marie, Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 10:16pm
Oh isee what you mean!
English - Writeacher, Tuesday, January 4, 2011 at 10:16pm
Ms. Sue is right. D has wordiness and redundancy in it.
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