Posted by Franco on Thursday, April 8, 2010 at 1:26pm.
Thank you very, very much for your last corrections! Can you tell me if the following expressions are possible and therefore correct?
1) When approaching/charging the dragon, Beowulf raised his shield and drew his sword. Differently, in contrast, (can you suggest to me other sentence connectors stressing a contrast?), the dragon coiled itself and spat fire (,instead at the end is also possible?)
2) In order to/so as to kill the fire-breathing dragon Beowulf raised his towering shield.
3) In “Beowulf” there are many kennings to describe both Beowulf and the fire-breathing monster (many kennings are used/ occur to describe ….) are all the expressions possible?
4) Both are descendents of a human being (Cain).
5) Trade improved thanks to the guilds, associations of tradesmen and artisans (Can you also say “trade was improved by the guilds?”)
6) The dragon seized Beowulf’s neck between his poisonous fangs.
7) Your conclusion must be drawn on the basis of what you have written before. You can’t start a sentence with “in conclusion” and then add a new point.
8) The sword struck the dragon less strongly (can you replace it with “powerfully”?) than required.
9) Beowulf and the dragon represent the good and the evil (or “good” and “evil” without definite article) respectively. Can you say “Beowulf is the symbol of good whereas the dragon that of evil?”
10) Those peasants who survive the black death became richer because they were able to ask for (demand?) payment for work done on their lord’s land.
- English - SraJMcGin, Thursday, April 8, 2010 at 9:54pm
1. Not being absolutely clear on what you'd like, you might try the following:
9. It reads better without the definite articles. At the end, it is not clear without repeating "the symbol" OR whereas the dragon represents evil
10. With the other verbs in the past tense, be sure to change "survive" to "survived."
Answer this Question
English - 1. I liked the work very much because I could help orphans who needed ...
English - 1. The English liked soccer very much. (What is the part of speech of...
English (very simple) - What are some phrases similar to "Case in point"? Thank ...
A thanks to Writeacher - THANK YOU lol thank you very much i now understand wat ...
english - i need to rite an english speech but i dont know what to do it on and ...
English - Hi. Please help me with a problem. Is the following grammatically ...
animal biology - Do whales have belly buttons? I really need to know. If anyone ...
English - Thank you very much! A very last thing. The story deals with (a family...
English - Thank you very much for your correction. Can you tell if this sentence...
English - Hello. I'm very grateful for your previous answer. I have a question. ...