Hello.
I could really use some help with my ESSAY. If anyone could tell me what they think of it and if anything needs corrected. Thanks Jess
Well I guess the best place to start is the beginning.
I was born in Kentucky, but only lived there for five years. Then moved to Florida which is where I live now.
I used to always wonder what I was going to be when I grew up. I went through lots of phases; one was the “I want to be a doctor” phase. That lasted for about three years, then it was “I want to be architect” that did not last long and then it was on to something else. Those were just a few things I thought about doing. I believe I was about twelve when I came upon the phase I want to be a photographer. This is where my story really starts.
I saved up to buy my first camera when I was fourteen. It was nothing special, but at the time I thought it was.
I took so many pictures with that thing, learned quit a few lessons from it to and I even got a few small jobs with that camera.
That experience taught me you can learn a lot about photography just by taking lots of pictures and trying different things. Put that together with lots of research and reading, which I did on my computer at home.
But that only satisfied me for so long. I wanted to learn more about this art, so my parents being the supportive parents they are told me I should go to photography school. I was not sure about it at first. But after awhile I got excited about it and realized how good of an opportunity this could be for me. So I went to NYIP for three years. It was one of the best things I have ever done for my future.
Once I finished school I decide I wanted to open up my own studio. I knew it was not going to be easy. I was going to have to find a way to get enough clients to pay for the rent of the building and other expenses.
But even knowing all of that, I still wanted to do it.
So began the search for a building, I wanted a place with a good location yet not to expensive.
After searching for about five months I found a great place in a little town called Wildwood.
Now I have a successful photography business called JauntyArt, with over fifty clients. I am every proud of my business, but I still have so much more I want to do with it and hope it will continue to grow. I know I still have much more to learn about this wonder full art.
Here is a few of the things I have learned so far about becoming a photographer.
“Passion” you must have passion for photography before even thinking about being a photographer. If you don’t have that then my advice would be to pick a new career
Get a camera. It does not have to be an expensive one. Especially if your not sure yet about becoming a photographer. Locate a cheap one or borrow someone’s.
Once you have your camera take lots of pictures and I mean lots! Now days we are so lucky to have digital camera. It’s so much cheaper and easier than the 35mm they had to use before the digital camera came out in 1993. They had to use film so that made everything more time consuming and costly. You could not just delete a picture after you took it, if it was a bad shot you wouldn’t know it till you had it developed
Look at other people’s photographs and study them, don’t copy them,
just get ideals from them. See how they used the lights to there advantage and how they played with the angles.
You need to have open eyes and an open mind all of the time. What I mean by that is, when I am just going about my day my eyes have kind of become a camera. As soon as I see something that I think is beautiful, my first thought is “this would be a great shot” or this would be a great place to take pictures.
Try and find a local photographer to work for as an assistant. If they don’t want to pay you just ask if you can shadow them. Trust me the best way to learn is to watch and be taught by someone who has years of experience.
Another cool thing and it is not necessarily important, but I think it helps. Think of your camera like your eyes. It makes you understand so much more when you look at it that way. For example if your looking at something that has poor lighting then the picture you are seeing is not going to look very good now is it?. Same rule applies to when you are taking a picture.
Work on your people skills. If you are doing portraits this is very important. You need to feel comfortable talking and communicating with your clients.
Buy a computer or a laptop you can upload your photos on, view and edit them.
Editing is an option that digital photography allows us to use, if we choose to.
I personally love to edit my photos. Things can be removed or added with just a couple clicks of a button.
After I get done with a photo shoot I spend about five to seven hours editing.
It does wonders when you just put the finishing touches on them.
The term us photographers like to use for editing is our digital dark room and basically that is what you are doing developing your pictures till you have them just the way you think they should be, then you print them.
If all goes well you will have a work of art, something that you have created.
There is just such a satisfying feeling when you see that finished product, and you know you have captured the subjected just the why you wanted to.
I hope all you photographers out there can fine your own style and become a great photographer someday.
There is no limit when you take pictures. That is the art of it. If you like what you have captured then that is the most important thing, because if you like it someone else is bound to like it also.
Just enjoy what you do and have fun and it will show in your photos.
First of all, ditch those first three sentences. The next paragraph is wordy and should be shortened and combined with the third paragraph.
Also, what is this for? Is it an English class assignment, and were you directed to write in 1st person? Is it for a college or scholarship application? Knowing who the intended readers are is very important.
Then ...
Please go over your paper with the following in mind. Thanks to PsyDAG for the following:
In the future, if nobody is available to proofread your work, you can do this yourself. After writing your material, put it aside for a day — at least several hours. (This breaks mental sets you might have that keep you from noticing problems.) Then read it aloud as if you were reading someone else's work. (Reading aloud slows down your reading, so you are less likely to skip over problems.)
[You can also either read it aloud to someone else or have someone else read it aloud to you! (The latter works really well!)]
If your reading goes smoothly, that is fine. However, wherever you "stumble" in your reading, other people are likely to have a problem in reading your material. Those "stumbles" indicate areas that need revising.
Once you have made your revisions, repeat the process above. Good papers often require many drafts.
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And here are three really good websites that will help, too.
http://blog.eduify.com/index.php/2009/10/28/editing-secrets-everyone-should-know/
http://www.sheboyganfalls.k12.wi.us/staff/dehogue/FSSH/proof.htm
http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/composition/proofing.htm
This is my Assignment..
Choose a topic from your personal
knowledge and experience
Write 3 to 10 pages (or between 750 to 2500 words)
Write in your own words from your perspective or point of view, using the pronoun I
Capture your reader’s attention with an interesting introductory paragraph Use specific examples to show what you mean
Use concrete or vivid words
Use complete sentences as well as vary your sentence length and structure
Use fully developed paragraphs where each paragraph has only one main idea with enough
supporting details to develop that idea clearly and logically
OK, good. First person is required.
I would, however, get rid of all second person references (the word "you" and any of its forms).
Did you read it aloud to someone? What did you find?
Hi Jess,
It's great that you are passionate about photography and have already taken steps towards pursuing it as a career. Your essay provides a good overview of your journey so far and your aspirations for the future.
In terms of feedback and corrections, here are a few suggestions:
1. Proofread your essay: There are a few typos and grammatical errors throughout. Take some time to go through the whole essay to fix these errors.
2. Structure your essay: Consider organizing your essay into paragraphs to make it easier to read and follow along. Each paragraph can focus on a specific aspect of your journey or a piece of advice for aspiring photographers.
3. Provide more details: While you have shared a general overview of your experiences, it would be helpful to provide specific examples or anecdotes that highlight your growth as a photographer. This will make your essay more engaging and relatable.
4. Consider expanding on certain points: For example, when discussing the importance of passion, you can elaborate on how your own passion for photography has motivated you to overcome challenges and explore different aspects of the art form.
5. Add citations or references: If you mention specific photography techniques or tips, it would be useful to include the sources from which you acquired that knowledge. This will strengthen the credibility of your essay.
Overall, your essay shows a strong enthusiasm for photography and a drive to continue learning and improving. Keep refining your skills, exploring new techniques, and building your portfolio. Don't hesitate to seek feedback from other photographers or mentors. Good luck with your future endeavors in the world of photography!