Posted by deborah on Friday, January 29, 2010 at 12:49pm.
Yes, that is definitely descriptive.
is the punctuation good or does this need to be revised?
No comma between "hair" and "and" in the first sentence.
Semi-colon after 2009
This is a run-on sentence and needs rephrasing. Use "a place for the...."
" kids to lose some...."
Our children always play together at either of our houses, or at the park where there is alot for the energetic kids can loose some of their energy.
where am i replacing the words " a place for" ?
or at the park, a place where the kids can lose some of their energy.
And get rid of "where there is alot for the energenic" ?
or do i just leave the sentence
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