Posted by Franco on .
Can you check the following sentences,please?
1) The sight of nature breaks (OR breaks in upon) the poet's mood (OR state) of loneliness which characterized the beginning of the poem
2)Nature is presented as a living presence (OR being), according to a pantheistic view of nature (Better place according at the beginnig?
3) The ship driven (DIRECTED??) by mysterious corpses is derived by the Dance of Death, in which (where, according to which???) men are taken away from their graves by skeletons
4)Also the Mariner seems to be endowed with supernatural powers (Can you start a sentence with also Or should you place it after the auxiliary/before the main verb)???
5) Fancy enables the poet to aggregate poetical devices (is it necessary to complete the sentence with SUCH AS ....)??// 6) Is it better to say Fancy is the capacity of association of material already provided by the poet OR of associating materials..???
1. I'd keep just "breaks."
2. I'd write, "According to a pantheistic view, nature is presented as living beings or gods."
3. I'd keep "driven" and "in which" -- but I don't understand what you mean by "derived by" ... ?
4. In place of "Also" I'd use "In addition, ... "
5. Yes, you need a "such as..." phrase at the end of the sentence.
6. Too many instances of "of" -- please rephrase this so there's only one "of."