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grammar

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There was another book my father had bought for me when I was a girl-- A picture book about the Trojan War, it reenacted the lives of the Ancient Greeks fighting in Troy

The "a girl-- A picture book..." is bugging me. Is the punctuation correct?

  • grammar - ,

    No, it's not, and there's a problem with the comma after "War" too. This would be better:

    There was another book my father had bought for me when I was a girl. It was a picture book about the Trojan War in which I learned about the lives of the Ancient Greeks fighting in Troy.

    OR

    There was another book my father had bought for me when I was a girl -- a picture book about the Trojan War. It reenacted the lives of the Ancient Greeks fighting in Troy.
    [although, honestly, I can't figure out how a book could reenact anything!]

  • grammar - ,

    Yes, I like the second one. And I will try to find a better word for reenact.

  • grammar - ,

    The word "depict" would work, as would most of its synonyms:

    To present a lifelike image of; delineate, describe, express, image, limn, picture, portray, render, represent, show.
    http://www.answers.com/depict

  • grammar - ,

    portrayed perhaps? but depict sounds good thank you!

  • grammar - ,

    You're very welcome. =)

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