"Give what you have, not what you want in the future"(This is the title)
One weekend, my mother decided to visit her mother in Detroit.
Upon getting to Detroit she gets word from a local resident that the city was damaged terribly by a huge storm. The local also adds that everyone was able to get out before the storm destroyed the place. Upon reaching their destination, the people are shocked to see that the shelter is only really able to support a certain number of people and not one person more. So the people of Detroit decide that they should just give up and go back home and live in a disastrous area rather than be over-crowded. Upon hearing the people say that they were going back home to live in the dissaster area, my mother tells everyone that they can probably live with her brother in his home. But after reaching her brothers' home, she realized that her brother would never allow tons of strangers to live with him and his family. After the locals find out they can't stay, they get angry and attack my mother while over her home.
What is your question.
First, check your use of verbs... you are writing about something that occurred in the past, but you are using present tense verbs.
Writeteacher told me what revisions to make. I have to write a family story in the form of a parable
http://www.jiskha.com/display.cgi?id=1258695329
It's better. And, yes, I didn't mention the present tense verbs because it's a parable. Those can usually be in either past or present, as long as you're consistent throughout.
Double-check that possessive -- one brother or more than one?
"...while over her home." = They were flying or floating over her home??
It's just one brother. I meant to say "while taking over her home"
one brother~~> singular possessive = brother's
more than one brother ~~> plural possessive = brothers'
I'm sorry to hear that your mother experienced such a difficult situation. From the given information, it seems like there was miscommunication and misunderstanding among the people in Detroit. Here's a breakdown of the events:
1. Your mother goes to visit her mother in Detroit but finds out that the city has been severely damaged by a storm.
2. The local resident informs her that everyone was able to evacuate before the storm hit, but the available shelter can only accommodate a certain number of people.
3. The people of Detroit, upon realizing the limited capacity of the shelter, decide to give up and go back home to live in the disastrous area rather than being overcrowded.
4. Your mother suggests that they could live with her brother, but upon reaching his home, she realizes that her brother would not allow strangers to stay with his family.
5. The locals, upon finding out they can't stay, become angry and attack your mother.
The title, "Give what you have, not what you want in the future," suggests that it is important to consider the resources and options available to us in the present rather than relying solely on future possibilities or desires. In this case, the people of Detroit were faced with limited shelter capacity, and despite the hope of finding an alternative solution, it was not feasible.
It's unfortunate that the situation escalated to violence, and it highlights the importance of patience, understanding, and open communication when dealing with challenging circumstances.