Body
The middle part of your paper is the body of the paper. It develops the most important points, which support your thesis statement. It contains three paragraphs. These paragraphs follow the points listed in the three-step format.
Paragraph 2 (first point of your thesis)
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My favorite place to go to as soon as I got to Asheville was the river. I would take my shoes off and place my feet inside the cool water of the river. Just the sound of the river’s gentle and even flow was enough to sooth me. The fact that the water was so chilly had no affect on me because the warm sun peeking through the trees always left me feeling cozy. No words can describe how I felt when I sat there on the wet grass; it was like the water was taking away all the stress and problems I had and washing them away with the current.
I am determined to make a great writer of you.
Take this sentence:
<<The fact that the water was so chilly had no affect on me because the warm sun peeking through the trees always left me feeling cozy. No words can describe how I felt when I sat there on the wet grass; it was like the water was taking away all the stress and problems I had and washing them away with the current>>
Consider: The water of the stream chilled my bare feet, but I felt only the sun through the trees, and was cozy and snug on the bank. The wet grass as my seat leaves me in a state of wonder at where all my cares have gone, they seem to drift downstream with the cleansing water.
Now work on those sentences, you can make them stand as portraits for all to see and feel. The reader needs to feel what you are describing.
Keep it up.
um...i don't thin i can ever get that good
am i allowed to use your suggestion? :)
No, what I am trying to get you to do is "show" the description, instead of "telling" it. Use words that evoke feelings, not sight. Work on those sentences. Show the reader, not tell the reader.
hmmm okk
...I couldn’t even feel my feet because of the chilly water of the stream, but the warm sun that came through the trees was enough to leave me feeling cozy. Sitting there on the bank, I felt as if the pure water of the river was washing away all my worries with it.
?
yes, close, but try to take "I" out of the picture, and place the reader in. As..
My feet felt numb because.....Sitting on the bank, my worries were washed away with the river moving downstream.
You want the reader to feel it. That is what I mean by showing, and getting away from the telling.
To write the second paragraph of the body of your paper, you can follow a three-step format:
Step 1: Topic Sentence
Start by writing a topic sentence that introduces the first point of your thesis statement. This sentence should clearly state what the paragraph will be about.
Step 2: Supporting Details
Provide specific details and examples to support your topic sentence. These details should illustrate your point and help convince the reader of its validity. You can include sensory details, personal experiences, or factual information to strengthen your argument.
Step 3: Closing Sentence
End the paragraph with a closing sentence that summarizes the main point and transitions to the next paragraph. This sentence should connect back to your thesis statement and set the stage for the next point you will discuss in the following paragraph.
Sample paragraph using the three-step format:
Paragraph 2: The Tranquility of the River
The beautiful scenery of Asheville always captivated me, but my favorite place to go as soon as I arrived was the river. As soon as I took off my shoes and dipped my feet into the cool water, I felt an immediate sense of peace. The sound of the river's gentle and rhythmic flow acted as a soothing melody, lulling all my worries away. Despite the chilly water, the warmth of the sun filtering through the trees made me feel cozy and content. Sitting on the wet grass by the river, it was as if all my stress and problems were being washed away with the current. The river became my escape, a place where I could find serenity amidst the chaos of life.
In this paragraph, the topic sentence (The Tranquility of the River) introduces the first point of the thesis statement. The supporting details (such as the sensory descriptions and personal experiences) provide evidence to support the main point. Finally, the closing sentence (The river became my escape, a place where I could find serenity amidst the chaos of life) summarizes the main point and prepares the reader for the next paragraph.