This is my personal reflective essay. Please fix any mistakes or awkward phrases ASAP
My body and my mind became lighter than air around me, as I threw myself on a couch where my back enjoyed being at. Released from the monstrous term of school, I felt saint-like, as if I could do anything in the world. Without thinking, I searched for the TV remote hidden somewhere in the couch. While going through, I discovered a part of the couch where I felt like touching the old, rough crease of my grandfather; familiar but uncomfortable. Then, I remembered something very crucial; crucial enough to make me feel like I¡¯ve finally found my unknown past from my brainwashed mind. The memory I recollected was my first and the best companion I¡¯ve ever had; my pet dog Woody.
I knew that my tedious daily life would change to an extraordinary one as soon as I saw him. I was ten back then, when I received Woody from one of my best friends. He was a small shih-tzu, coloured with brown and white around his soft, cloud-like body. I named him ¡®Woody¡¯, hoping that we will become friends as the characters in my favourite animation film, Toy Story. Though he seemed he was afraid of me, I didn¡¯t have to worry about this for a long period of time as we soon became intimated enough to play together and sleep together. Everyday, I sprinted home from school full of excitement, passionate enough to outrun Usain Bolt, eager to play with my new best friend.
Woody, to me, was a source of energy which was strong enough to revive my life full of boredom, to ecstasy. Before Woody entered into my life, I had nothing much to show-off about myself. Maybe a couple of certificates I got from school for being a ¡®friendly classmate¡¯ each year or a trophy from miserable, body-torturing experience of Tae-Kwon-Do tournament. When my neighbour or close relatives showed me their fancy-looking ¡®Gameboy¡¯ and a shelf full of comic books, I used to tell them they are worthless. I thought I wasn¡¯t being envious and telling the truth, but my heart knew that I was being sarcastic. However, everything changed. After Woody¡¯s appearance in my life, we were the centre of attention. Neither Gameboys nor comic books boasted my jealousy anymore. I had Woody.
Though Woody was a perfect, adorable pet for our family, he had one particular problem, just like any others. Since we live in an apartment, Woody didn¡¯t have enough time to spend outdoors. He loved running, as if he was a wild horse running across the concrete plain like he had never run before. One chilly, winter afternoon, my parents, Woody and I decided to go to the park nearby to get some fresh air. As usual, Woody lost control. This time however, Woody managed to escape from my secure, prison-like grip and ran away from us towards the main road. My parents and I chased after him, and I tripped. I could see my parents still running after him and out of nowhere, I heard the car screeching with sudden halt. Just like the end of the world in a movie, people shrieked from all direction. My mom came back and grabbed me as I got up and took me back into the house. I never saw Woody again.
My life was back to normal, rather, too ordinary. After the ¡®incident¡¯, my parents and mates avoided talking about pets or animals. When someone accidently brought up the unforgettable memory, I blamed his death to myself, for not being responsible enough to hold him tightly. I couldn¡¯t stop thinking about Woody for a while; quite a few weeks, actually. Death of Woody was not what I¡¯ve thought of before. I thought my life was going to be the same as those in bedtime stories, ¡®happily ever after¡¯. Realising all those happy hours with Woody is just going to be another memory of my life; I¡¯ve never felt so heartbreaking and traumatized.
Several weeks later, I read a section in the paper on humanity. The topic of the day was ¡°When we say ¡®Hi¡¯ to someone, we have to expect to say ¡®Goodbye¡¯ someday¡±. I guessed I have to think the same. Whatever the cause, as a living creature, we have to anticipate a farewell on a certain relationship. As of the tenacious memory of Woody holding on to the edge of my brain, I decided to let it go. Leaving a vacant spot for a new, upcoming experience, I am waiting.
The chocolate-black remote was under the new cushion we replaced few weeks ago. The damage of it, of course, was another masterpiece by our beloved family. Time approached hastily for my favourite show on Television. It has been 9 weeks since I was shut off with my relaxing hobby by another hectic term. Looking at the injured skin of the couch once more, another thing popped up into my head. Something I always wanted to say but never have; it was nice knowing you Woody.
enjoyed being at. = delete "at."
While going through, = while searching
crease of my grandfather? = sounds awkward
feel like I¡¯ve finally = feel as if I had finally...
companion I¡¯ve ever had; = either "I've" or "I had ever"
¡®Woody¡ = you need to discover why the strange marks = Woody!
hoping that we will become = this needs to be in the past tense = hopeing that we would become
hoping that we will become = didn't
intimated = intimate
¡®friendly classmate¡¯= just "friendly classmate"
from miserable, body-torturing = from the miserable.......the (or a) Tae, etc.
¡®Gameboy¡¯ = get rid of that punctuatiion. If you want an exclamation point, it goes at the end of the sentence.
they are worthless = they were (used to puts you in the past tense, not present)
I wasn¡¯t = wasn't
After Woody¡¯s = Woody's (what key are you hitting? Orginarily the ' is 2 keys tot the right of L and not shifted.
Woody didn¡¯t = didn't
as if he was a = as if he were
sudden halt.= a sudden halt
all direction = all directions (plural)
¡®incident¡¯= incident!
his death to myself = blamed his death on
. I couldn¡¯t = couldn't
Death of Woody = The death of Woody
what I¡¯ve thought = what I had thought
¡®happily ever after¡¯ = happily ever after!
Realising = Realizing
I¡¯ve never = I've never felt
heartbreaking and traumatized. = heartbroken
In order not to waste so much time, study the next-to-last paragraph and eliminate all those strange marks (!)
we replaced few weeks = a few weeks
Television = television
you Woody. = you, Woody.
If you have time, I suggest you make al the corrections and repost for final proofreading.
Sra
Here is your revised essay:
As soon as I threw myself onto the couch, my body and mind became as light as air. Finally free from the monstrous term of school, I felt a sense of liberation, as if I could conquer anything in the world. Without a second thought, I began my search for the TV remote, hidden somewhere within the depths of the couch. As I rummaged through, my hand stumbled upon a worn crease in the fabric. It felt familiar, yet uncomfortable – reminiscent of my grandfather. It triggered a crucial memory, one that resurfaced from the depths of my brainwashed mind. It was the memory of my first and greatest companion, my pet dog Woody.
Seeing Woody for the first time, I knew my mundane daily life would transform into something extraordinary. I was ten years old when one of my closest friends gifted me Woody, a small shih-tzu with brown and white fur as soft as clouds. I named him after the character in my favorite film, Toy Story, hoping that our friendship would mirror that of the animated characters. Although Woody seemed afraid of me initially, it didn't take long for us to become close enough to play and sleep together. Each day, my excitement would surge as I sprinted home from school, eager to spend time with my new best friend.
Woody became a source of energy, infusing even the most mundane moments with excitement and joy. Prior to his arrival, I had nothing much to show off about myself – perhaps a few certificates for "friendly classmate" and a trophy from a torturous Tae-Kwon-Do tournament. When my neighbors or relatives would flaunt their fancy Gameboys and shelves filled with comic books, I used to dismiss them as worthless. I believed I wasn't envious, that I was merely speaking the truth. However, everything changed when Woody came into my life – he became the center of attention. Suddenly, Gameboys and comic books no longer ignited my jealousy. I had Woody, and that was enough.
Although Woody was the perfect and adorable pet for our family, he shared a common problem with many others – he lacked outdoor time due to our apartment living. Running was his passion, as if he were a wild horse galloping across a concrete plain. One chilly winter afternoon, my parents, Woody, and I decided to go to the nearby park for some fresh air. As expected, Woody's excitement got the better of him. This time, however, he managed to escape my secure grip and darted towards the main road. My parents and I frantically chased after him, but I stumbled and fell. I witnessed my parents continue their pursuit while I heard the screech of a car coming to an abrupt halt. Panic and chaos ensued as people shrieked from every direction. My mom grabbed me and rushed me back home. I never saw Woody again.
Life returned to normal – if anything, it became too ordinary. My parents and friends avoided any mention of pets or animals. Whenever someone accidentally brought up that unforgettable memory, I blamed myself for not being responsible enough to hold onto Woody. For several weeks, I couldn't stop thinking about him. Woody's sudden departure shattered the image I had of my life, one that was supposed to end with a fairytale, "happily ever after." Realizing that those joyful moments with Woody would become mere memories, I felt a deep heartbreak and trauma like never before.
Several weeks later, I came across an article in the newspaper discussing humanity. The topic of the day was "When we say 'Hi' to someone, we have to expect to say 'Goodbye' someday." I realized that this principle applied to my own life. As living creatures, we must anticipate farewells in our relationships. With Woody's memory gripping the edge of my consciousness, I made the decision to let go. I wanted to create room for new experiences, waiting for what was to come.
As I reached for the chocolate-black TV remote, nestled beneath the new cushion that replaced the old one a few weeks ago, I couldn't help but notice the damage caused by my beloved family. Time was fleeting, and my favorite show would be starting soon. It had been nine weeks since my relaxation hobby had been interrupted by another demanding term. I glanced at the couch's worn surface once more, and another thought entered my mind – something I had always wanted to say but never had the chance: "It was nice knowing you, Woody."