Posted by ELINA on Friday, June 12, 2009 at 8:50pm.
You don't have Calvin's name in your first sentence.
You have at least two runon sentences.
You need to capitalize Europe and put commas between the names of the countries.
but overall is it good?
You have the right information about Calvin. But I can't say it's good when it's so hard to read because of your lack of punctuation.
oh okay, but if I didn't have that lack of punctuation then would it be good?
I'll tell you if it's good after I see your final paragraph -- after you've corrected it.
my teacher said it didn't have to be a paragraph length but here it is:
John Calvin was a french lawyer who set up a christian state in city of Geneva in Switzerland. His state was ruled by religious authorities. His government was really strict. People in that city had to get used to his "blue laws", because of Calvin's emphasis on seriousness & hard work this new religion appealed especially to people in business. Calvanism spread throughout europe, mostly strong in Switzerland, Netherlands Scotland, & parts of France where Calvin's followers were known as Huguenots.
This is much better! :-)
I suggest you make the following corrections that are boldfaced and underlined.
John Calvin was a French lawyer who set up a Christian state in the city of Geneva in Switzerland. His state was ruled by religious authorities. His government was really strict. People in that city had to get used to his "blue laws", because of Calvin's emphasis on seriousness and hard work. This new religion appealed especially to people in business. Calvinism spread throughout Europe, mostly strong in Switzerland, Netherlands, Scotland, and parts of France where Calvin's followers were known as Huguenots.
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