Posted by john on Friday, April 17, 2009 at 3:19pm.
I agree with GuruBlue's previous comment about your third line.
I see a few grammatical errors. In line three, the verb should be "makes" (add an "s" for third person pronouns). "Listening" is the correct spelling (not "listeniong").
Also, you repeat "sitting on the beach" quite a bit. It's all right because it's poetry, but take a look at the third stanza:
"Sitting on the beach / watching the changing tide, / while sitting on the beach."
"Sitting on the beach" is especially repetitive in that stanza.
Related Questions
language - is my free verse peom correct? can you check for any errors? thank ...
English - CHECK PLEASE?! Part 1: Poem Structure "Annbel lee" by edgar ...
English - Part 1: Poem Structure "Annbel lee" by edgar allen poe ...
Literature - I need help writing a free verse poem on a newspaper article I read...
free verse poems please - i need really good examples of free verse poems please
English - In a free verse poem do you need punctuation?
English - A last doubt. I hope you can have a look at it. 1)How can I check this...
early childhood education - A poem that does not ryme is called: a. free verse. ...
English - Can you please check if the word choice is correct and if the words in...
english - 1. Which of the following statements about Saadi's sayings is not ...
For Further Reading
