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March 29, 2017

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So I'm working on an english paper but I've been stuck the past hour on what to do. I'm trying to take my teachers advice by putting in an anaphorism (repeated words or phrases)but I'm having trouble. I'm repeating the phrase "eight months" but I'm stuck on my last sentence. I want to write "Eight months of living hell." but I don't like using the words "hell" even though this describes the point I'm trying to get across perfectly. It's not like me to use words like that though and it makes me nervous to write it in an essay. Does anyone have any thoughts on what I could write instead? I was thinking of just putting "Eight long months" but I don't know if that will sound stupid seeing as I'm stressing the "eight months" part or if it's okay. I'm sorry if this is confusing but if someone could please help me that would be great! Thanks so much!

  • English - ,

    "Eight long months" seems weak -- but o.k. Can you think of another phrase you could repeat that would tell what you felt during those months?

    "Hell" is acceptable in this context. However, synonyms include misery, despair, hopelessness, devastation, chaos.

  • English - ,

    Yeah I know I think it fits perfectly too but I am trying to avoid using it...it's really frustrating trying to think of something else though! Would "Eight miserable months" or "Eight long, painful months" work? Or do you think I should just stick to "Eight long months"? It does sound kind of weak though. Do you have any other ideas? Thanks so much for helping me! I'm sorry this is all I can come up with so far!

  • English - ,

    I'd stick with "eight long months" rather than adding adjectives to it. The three-syllable phrase is more memorable than a longer phrase.

    It's difficult to comment further without knowing the subject of your paper.

  • English - ,

    Hi--

    "Eight hellish months" would keep the meaning of what you are trying to say.
    You are putting "hell" in the form of an adjective.

    Hope this helps.

  • English - ,

    Thanks so much guys! My essay is about how everyone is the master of their own fates and I am giving an example of how I learned this valuable lesson. I had to have jaw surgery and at first I was miserable and wasn't acting like my normal bubbly cheerful self, but then how I realized that I was the one making this situation more difficult and that if I changed my attitude I could turn a not so great situation into a positive one. I had a writing confrence with my teacher about this and he really like my essay but told me to "show" more than "tell" so he suggested stressing the point upfront about this surgery was a normal surgery with 6 weeks or recovery...that it was eight months. So that's why I'm using anaphora to stress this point more. Here's this part of my essay:

    This past August I needed to have jaw surgery, which takes eight months to recover from. Eight months of having your mouth wired shut. Eight months of swallowing soft, blended foods without chewing or even using your tongue. (Eight long months.) This wasn’t exactly what I had in mind for my junior year.

    Just thought I'd give you a better idea as to what I'm talking about! I hope it makes sense to you! Do you think I even need the last "eight months" phrase? I thought it gave it more of a ring with the last one in, but I'm not sure! Thanks for helping me!

  • English - ,

    I'd use a more personal tone -- Eight months of having my mouth wired shut . . . or even using my mouth . . .

    You could also remove the parentheses around (Eight long months.} But I would definitely keep this phrase in because it emphasizes the time period.

    It's almost impossible for me to comprehend this length of time being in such misery.

  • English - ,

    Yeah I know! It is really hard for others to understand that. The first three months were horrible because I just kept thinking "why me?" which I'm not normally like! But then after my three month check-up I started thinking about how I was handling things and then I became more of a positive person again! But this experience made for a good essay! ;)

    Alright so I'll remove the parentheses then & I'll keep the "eight long months" in! Thank you so so much for your help...I was really torn as to what to do! And I like the idea of adding more of a personal tone...I'll try to fix that! Thank you! :)

  • English - ,

    You're very welcome! You're a terrific person for turning this hellish experience into a positive in your life.

  • English - ,

    Oh thank you! It wasn't easy but once I figured it out life became fabulous again! :)

    Thanks again! Have a great night!

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