posted by Bryan on .
Is this good to say for a thank you letter.
Thank you for the opportunity to visit with you and see your office last Thursday. Both the interview with you and Ms. Robinson made for an exciting and complete day. Thank you for your hospitality during my visit and for all your efforts to arrange my visit. Having seen your company, I am all the more enthused about the career opportunity that Workforce Planning Unit of the Human Resources and Organization offers allowing me to get my foot in the door. I look forward to your decision.
Since I don't know what actually happened, it is hard to evaluate.
Was it merely a "visit" or was it a job interview? If the latter, you might want to delete the multiple references to "visit." I'm not sure what you mean by getting your "foot in the door." does that refer to the interview or a job offer?
You seem to be overdoing it. Did it really make a "complete day" for you? Did they just show their office or did you get a tour of the facility? There is no need to thank her for seeing her office.
Does the decision involve employment or are you being considered for more than one position?
Be more concise. Thank them for the interview, indicate that you appreciate their time and effort and that you are looking forward to working for their company.
I hope this helps. Thanks for asking.