Homework Help: Writing

Posted by Ahlami on Friday, July 4, 2008 at 6:33pm.

I have a paper to complete with the topic Do you long for the past or look eagerly to the future?
Could you grammar check the below introduction?
Thesis:
The future holds many rewards that my past did not offer.

In my years at Queens Restaurant I worked from 9 to 5 o'clock everyday. It was not the best job I had throughout my life, but it rewards me with life's benefits that my old janitoral work did not offer 5 years ago. From the thought of having to make my own way in life, a position working for seven hours a day at Queens Restaurant is the best place to be in 5 years. The future holds many rewards that my past did not offer.

Writing - Ms. Sue, Friday, July 4, 2008 at 6:49pm
You don't make it clear whether you're still working at Queens Restaurant.

Also -- do you want to be working at Queen's Restuarant in 5 years?
Writing - catherine, Saturday, July 5, 2008 at 8:01pm
Identify any examples of bias presented by the author. If none exist, explain how you determined this.

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