Posted by I need ENGLISH help on Saturday, April 5, 2008 at 1:25pm.
Two things -- one technical, the other rather major.
1. Replace the semicolon in the last sentence with a comma. You don't have two complete sentences on each side of the semicolon. You also need a comma after "strenuous."
2. Why are you worrying about the complete introduction before writing the first draft of the body of your paper? All you should be concerned with until you're almost finished with the paper is the thesis statement. If I take the last sentence above as your thesis statement, it's OK -- not complete yet, but OK.
So ... do you have a plan or an outline (use it like a roadmap) for your entire paper? If not, that's what you need to do next. Don't worry about finalizing the introduction, but do make sure your thesis statement is a good one.
http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/composition/thesis.htm
http://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/resource/545/01/
http://leo.stcloudstate.edu/acadwrite/thesistatement.html
Once you have a good, complete plan (outline), then dive into the first draft of the body of your paper. This should be the bulk of your time and energy. Once you have it drafted, revised, etc., THEN you should deal with the introduction.
http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/index2.htm
http://owl.english.purdue.edu/handouts/general/index.html
http://leo.stcloudstate.edu/acadwrite/intro.html
And don't worry about the length of the intro. For one of my major grad school papers, I used a really significant quotation from the book my paper was based on (The Brothers Karamazov) and took off from there. But using the particular quotation didn't occur to me until I was well into writing the paper itself.
Related Questions
english - Writing terms. Fill in the blanks. 1-final 9-topic 2-prewiting 10-...
English Paper - We're currently writing a paper this week , so I need help ...
englsih writing tips - So I really want my writing to improve. My teacher is ...
english/8 - Writing terms. Fill in the blanks. 1-final 9-topic 2-prewiting 10-...
English - I need help in writing a general statement and transition statement to...
help me to construct this in a good essay - English 101AYR has now been in ...
English - I need your opinion on this. I'm writing a research paper with ...
English - I'm writing an essay involving analysis of a short story. I need ...
english - you are to write a one or two paragraph essay on a topic of your ...
Chemistry/English - In chemistry we are writing a paper about an inventor.. We ...
For Further Reading