Hello, Ms. Sue. (: Here's that Genghis Khan essay. I'd appreciate constructive criticism.
- - -
Genghis Khan possessed brilliant tactics and advanced technology for his time, which resulted in him conquering a broad amount of land. Under Mongol rule, China was vastly affected, and nowadays Khan is viewed in several varying ways among the Mongols. Genghis Khan was both a hero and tyrant, assisting Mongolia in their development as well as ending the lives of many.
Because of Genghis Khan’s clever tactics and useful technology, he was able to conquer a vast amount of territory. First and foremost, Khan introduced universal service. This was a principle in which every able-bodied Mongol was expected to serve him and support the military. Since fear of Genghis was widespread, practically all of the Mongols obeyed. Equally important, Genghis Khan and his army used a hooked lance, an arced, long sword, which not only was used to effectively drag enemies from their horses, but was also useful because Mongol soldiers could slaughter their adversaries without even stepping down from their horses. Likewise, the Mongol leaders having preceded Khan promoted army officials because of their family connections, not their skill. Hence, it was quite the improvement when Genghis promoted Generals according to their abilities. Furthermore, one of Genghis’s most infamous strategies was to isolate, surround, and annihilate. Khan would separate the opposing army, surrounding each individual cluster. Because they were then weakened, Khan’s army would annihilate, or kill them.
Under Mongol rule, China was affected positively, with improved healthcare, increased trade, and an emergency supply of food. In the first place, since plaque, drought, and famine were common in China, under Mongol rule, the Emperor set up a hospital in every province, restoring a certain amount of health to China. Additionally, the Grand Canal was set into use, exploited by traders. With two hundred thousand cargo ships visiting Chinese ports each year, the trade was increased. Just as surely, in case of an emergency, grain was always kept in storage, to prevent famine. Today, in Mongolia, Genghis is viewed as both a founder and an ancestor. To some Mongolians, Khan is the root of their history. Without him, there most likely wouldn’t be a Mongolia. He is also considered an ancestor, or the father of the Mongol nation.
Given his actions, Genghis Khan acted as both a hero and a tyrant for a multitude of reasons. For instance, Khan could have been viewed as a hero because he permitted religious freedom within his empire. The majority of Mongol rulers did not practice religious tolerance, so Khan was one of the first rulers to do so. Some might consider Khan a tyrant, because he killed each and every enemy, keeping no prisoners, which was a tactic of his; psychological warfare. The only prisoners he kept were those he cruelly used as human shields at the front line. Genghis Khan preformed quite a few heroic acts, but he also came down hard on every single one of his adversaries, making Khan also a vicious tyrant.
Genghis Khan possessed brilliant tactics and advanced technology for his time, which resulted in him conquering a broad amount of land. Under Mongol rule, China was vastly affected, and nowadays Khan is viewed in several varying ways among the Mongols. Genghis Khan was both a hero and tyrant, assisting Mongolia in their development as well as ending the lives of many.
Hello! I'm sorry, but I'm not Ms. Sue. I'm Explain Bot, an AI bot here to assist you. However, I'd be happy to provide you with some constructive criticism on your essay.
Overall, your essay provides a good overview of Genghis Khan and his impact. However, there are a few areas where you could improve:
1. Structure: Consider organizing your essay into clear paragraphs with topic sentences. This will make it easier for your reader to follow your arguments and the flow of your ideas.
2. Evidence: While you mention some tactics and technologies used by Genghis Khan, it would be beneficial to provide specific examples or evidence to support your claims. For example, when discussing his universal service policy, you could mention instances where this policy was implemented successfully in battles.
3. Balance: When discussing the positive and negative impact of Genghis Khan, make sure to provide a balanced perspective. While you mention his promotion of religious freedom, it would be helpful to provide a counterargument or discuss some negative aspects of his rule.
4. Style and tone: Consider using more varied sentence structures to enhance the flow and readability of your essay. Also, be mindful of your tone, ensuring that it remains neutral and objective throughout the essay.
To further improve your essay, I would suggest doing additional research to gather more specific examples, quotes, or historical evidence to support your points. Additionally, revising and proofreading your essay for grammar and spelling errors will enhance its overall quality.
I hope this feedback is helpful! Good luck with your revisions.