Un jour avec Pierre
Chaque jour, Pierre se levé huit heures. Il a mangé le petit dejeuner et parlait avec sa mama et son papa. Son papa commandait Pierre à l’école. Il a été premier. Ce n’était personne à l’école. Après un moment, Pierre et des éleves entraient á la salle de classe. Il a eu l’histoire. Pierre pensait l’histoire était alésage. Le maître enseignait et demandait des eleves, mais Pierre a été avec son rêves. Il a pensé avec sa chat, Aphrodite. Elle disparaissent hier. Pierre allait à le préau. Il jouait au foot avec ses amis. Dans le dejeuner Pierre a mangé la pain du fromage. Il sentait le bien odeur sur le jus d’orange. Il a goûté comme le ciel. le reste du jour de classe est allé vite. Pierre a fait un cycle à la maison. ”Mon petit chou!”, sa maman l’a appelé. ”Salut! Ca va?”, Pierre réponsait. Sa mama a été bien. Pierre s’est assis près de table. ils ont eu le bifteck pour le dîner. Il est Pierre son nourriture de favori. Il a besoin de dormir. Il s’est couché, et il sommeil rapidement.
I am wondering if this is rigth? I have no idea.. please help me correct the text!
1)se levait à huit heures
2)il prenait son petit déjeuner
3)sa maman
4)son papa amenait Pierre...
5)il était le premier
please can you post the english for the rest of your translation
Thank you for using the Jiskha Homework Help Forum. The first thing to consider is the contrast between l'imparfait and le passé composé. Since you begin with "Chaque jour" and then the Imperfect, you might wish to change "a mangé" if you consider the following English. The Imperfect would translate "he used to or he was + ing" while the passé composé would translate "ate, did eat." the Imperfect stresses what happened over and over again while the passé composé stresses action = over and done with.
I only mention this difference since mk-tintin suggest "se levait" in the first sentence.
Again, "Après un moment" did the students enter (action completed) or were they entering (never quite completing that action?) I would have suggested the passé composé = ils sont entrés dans... Pierre a pensé/pensait QUE... (clause relater "que") Unfortunately, the adjective "alésage" is the bore of a cylinder.
Here is a little lesson in how to use a good dictionary. Take the word "bore" and write down ALL the French possibilities: trou (hole), calibre (of a gun) âme (of a cannon), alésage (of a cylinder), ennui (nuisance), raseur (person. The next step is to look up the primary meaning in English of each French word (in parentheses). Knowing you want an adjective (boring, probably), eliminate all the nouns. Try a synonym: boring, annoying, etc. and settle on "ennuyeux" but use the feminine form since you are modifying a feminine noun!
"demandait DES élèves" would be asking FOR students, so try "AUX." Always check that each adjective modifies the noun in gender (masculine/feminine) and number (singular/plural) then look at "rêves" which is plural, as the adjective must be. It's either "son chat" or because of the name "sa chatte." Now, WAS she disappearING or DID she disappear? (l'imparfait vs. le passé composé) WAS he goING or DID he go? à + le = au... Perhaps "Pour" le déjeuner... Check the gender of "pain" and was it made of cheese? "sur" le jeu??? Are you sure you want literally "il a goûté comme le ciel?" "le" is capitalized as the first word of a sentence. You might want to change "a fait un cycle" but definitely Ça with cédille. The verb "to answer" is "répondre," selecting l'imparfait or le passé composé (2nd choice is mine!) Mk-tintin already corrected "mama" for you. Do you want "avoir" or "aller" with bien?
Please look at "it is his favorite food" because food is the subject, not Pierre. Always check gender also, if you aren't sure. "sommeil" is a noun and will not function as a verb. "to fall asleep" is "se dormir" in case you like that.
Here's a good general rule when you are writing: SIMPLIFY what you are trying to say. Forget thinking it through in English first, because the temptation is to translate that literally and that rarely, if ever, works. Always try to use the structures and vocabulary you have mastered in class.
Feel free to think this through again and repost with what you believe to be all the corrections. Then, one of us will be only too glad to proofread it again for you.
Mme
One day with Pierre
Every day, Pierre wakes up at eight o'clock. He has breakfast and talks with his mom and dad. His dad drives him to school. He arrives first. There's nobody at school. After a while, Pierre and some students enter the classroom. He has history class. Pierre thinks the history is boring. The teacher teaches and asks students, but Pierre is lost in his daydreams. He thinks about his cat, Aphrodite. She disappeared yesterday. Pierre goes to the playground. He plays soccer with his friends. For lunch, Pierre eats cheese and bread. He smells the delicious scent of orange juice. It tastes heavenly. The rest of the school day goes by quickly. Pierre rides his bike home. "Mon petit chou!" his mom calls him. "Hi! How are you?" Pierre replied. His mom is well. Pierre sits down at the table. They have steak for dinner. It's Pierre's favorite food. He needs to sleep. He lies down and falls asleep quickly.
To correct the text, I have made several changes in grammar, word usage, and punctuation. Here is the revised text:
Un jour avec Pierre
Chaque jour, Pierre se lève à huit heures. Il prend son petit-déjeuner et discute avec sa maman et son papa. Son papa le conduit à l'école. Il arrive le premier. Il n'y a personne à l'école. Après un moment, Pierre et d'autres élèves entrent dans la salle de classe. Il y a histoire. Pierre trouve l'histoire ennuyeuse. Le maître enseigne et pose des questions aux élèves, mais Pierre est perdu dans ses rêveries. Il pense à son chat, Aphrodite. Elle a disparu hier. Pierre se rend à la cour de récréation. Il joue au football avec ses amis. Au déjeuner, Pierre mange du pain et du fromage. Il sent la délicieuse odeur du jus d'orange. Cela a un goût divin. Le reste de la journée scolaire passe rapidement. Pierre rentre chez lui à vélo. "Mon petit chou !" appelle sa maman. "Salut ! Comment ça va ?" répond Pierre. Sa maman va bien. Pierre s'assoit à table. Ils mangent du bifteck pour le dîner. C'est la nourriture préférée de Pierre. Il a besoin de dormir. Il s'allonge et s'endort rapidement.
Please note that some sentences are still a bit awkward, but I have tried to maintain the meaning and flow of the original text while making corrections.