We had to write a poem about some sort of abstract object or idea. Can you tell me how my poem sounds and if you could figure out what I'm talking about?
"With me you can go on new adventures
An undiscovered portal to the imagination.
I do this in your sleep
As you’re resting, your mind is not.
I’m an enemy
By which you wake up sad
Or frightened.
Yet, I’m a friend
When it comes to life’s fantasies.
I exist in everyone
But there are few who will
Look upon them as untold stories.
I relive precious moments
And recreate horrifying ones.
What am I?"
How's it sound?
It's better than 95% of the poems I read in The New Yorker. I am not sure of the answer to your "Who Am I" question, but have some ideas. I am a bit troubled by the idea of a poem as a riddle, however. On the other hand, most modern poems are riddles, since it is fashionable to make them almost undecipherable.
I think you can be proud of what you have written.
I'm not a good critique of poetry. Perhaps another teacher will respond.
However, I think you're talking about dreaming.
Thanks!! Yeah, we had to write it in some sort of riddle.
Yep, you're right.
We had to use this poem (below) as sort of an example; maybe I should reword the ending to make it sound like less of a riddle. Does anybody have anybody ideas?
I personally think it would be a better poem without the "What am I?" line at the end.
Your poem sounds intriguing and captivating. It effectively uses contrasting imagery to convey the dual nature of the subject. The mention of being an enemy and a friend, as well as the references to both sad and frightening awakenings, adds to the mystery and complexity of the concept you're describing.
As for figuring out what you're talking about, based on the description in the poem, it seems like you are referring to dreams. The lines about being an undiscovered portal to the imagination, occurring in sleep, and reliving precious or horrifying moments all point to the world of dreams.