Posted by Bryan on Tuesday, October 23, 2007 at 10:22am.
This is FAR too informal!! Here's my suggested revision:
Hello, Mr LeMera.
I am requesting information about your school. I am a senior in high school in Temple Hills, MD. I'm interested in becoming a mobile electronics certified installer and plan to eventually open my own business.
Please let me know what your school is like so I can determine if your school is right for me.
Thank you in advance for your time.
Bryan Martin
youremailaddress@whatever.com
If you write an email to someone of this stature the way you write emails to your friends, you won't be taken seriously. Remember to use formal language in formal situations; informal language is find for your pals, but not adults!
=)
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