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December 22, 2014

Homework Help: proofread introduction

Posted by apoorva on Wednesday, October 17, 2007 at 2:05am.

i'm writing a informative essay on a festival i celebrate in my culture.

i decided to separate the history of the festival and the introduction of the essay into too paragraphs.

so my question is if my introduction sounds okay without the history because i'm going to mention it in my next paragraph.

So basically, does it sound too vague because i don't want to repeat myself in my body paragraphs so i want to keep it simple.

and also please comment on my thesis which is the last sentence of the paragraph.

thank you.


India is known as a land of diversities because of its many cultures and celebrations. One of my favorite festivals to celebrate is called Holi. Holi is “an ancient East Indian Festival held at the time of the full moon in March” by the Hindus. It was originally named after a Hindu demon, ‘Holika.’ This happy occasion is known as the “Festival of Colors” because it involves children, friends, and neighbors gathering on the streets together and a riot of color takes over. Colored powders are thrown into air and are smeared on faces and bodies. Not only is Holi a joyous festival to celebrate with friends and family, but it is also meant to celebrate the death of winter while the colors used in this festival represents the arrival of spring.

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