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July 6, 2015

Homework Help: can someone edit my paragraph thanks!

Posted by Anonymous on Monday, April 30, 2007 at 10:14am.

Gorbachev did not think about all the consequences that would happened if he changed Russia into perestroika. He underestimated the effect that perestroika would have on Russia. Yes, his political initiatives were great for freedom and democracy but all that freedom had a huge price. Since the collapse of the Soviet Union Russia has been struggling to build a democratic political system and market economy. Everyone has to accept their wrongs and this was one of Gorbachev mistakes instead of blaming others. It was because of Gorbachev USSR fell and ever since then Russia has not been the same.

Gorbachev did not think about all the consequences of changing Russia into perestroika<~~the use of this word is strange; literally it means "restructuring" -- ??. He underestimated the effect that perestroika would have on Russia. Yes, his political initiatives were great for freedom and democracy<~~add comma but all that freedom had a huge price. Since the collapse of the Soviet Union<~~add comma Russia has been struggling to build a democratic political system and market economy. Everyone has to accept their<~~pronoun/antecedent mismatch; see link below wrongs<~~change "wrongs" to "errors" and add comma and this was one of Gorbachev<~~add apostrophe and "s" since this word is used as a possessive mistakes instead of blaming others<~~"instead..." is strange phrasing; you should probably delete these last four words. It was because of Gorbachev that the USSR fell<~~add comma and ever since then Russia has not been the same.

http://grammar.ccc.commnet.edu/grammar/pronouns.htm

"but all that freedom had a huge price."

Also, you need to state what that price was/is.

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